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" Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined. "
Josh Billings
Life Is Short
Life
Short
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" Take all the fools out of this world and there wouldn't be any fun living in it, or profit. "
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" If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself. "
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" I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am most certain of the first time. "
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" Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can't suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb. "
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" Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got. "
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" There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory. "
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" Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things as they ought to be done. "
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" There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing. "
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" The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear. "
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" Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected. "
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" If there was no faith there would be no living in this world. We could not even eat hash with any safety. "
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World
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" Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place. "
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" Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves. "
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" Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. "
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" Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius. "
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" Man was created a little lower than the angels and has been getting a little lower ever since. "
Josh Billings
Angels
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" Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors. "
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" If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time. "
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" There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't. "
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" One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can. "
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He
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" It is a very delicate job to forgive a man, without lowering him in his own estimation, and yours too. "
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Job
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" Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere, wide awake, on tiptoe. "
Josh Billings
Everywhere
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" Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. "
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" In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us. "
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Youth
Difficulties
Age
" There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying. "
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Truth
Tell
Some People
" Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel. "
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" There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it. "
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" Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight. "
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Training
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" One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness. "
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You
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