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" Man was created a little lower than the angels and has been getting a little lower ever since. "
Josh Billings
Angels
Than
Man
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" Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread. "
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" There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: twins. "
Josh Billings
Which
Two
Twins
" Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal. "
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Scandal
Tea
Maids
" Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves. "
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Gets
He
Money
" Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. "
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Smile
Marriage
Love
" You’d better not know so much, than to know so many things that ain’t so. "
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Many
Better
Things
" Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. "
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Oil
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Like
" There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it. "
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People
World
Time
" Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something. "
Josh Billings
Influence
Woman
Wants
" Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. "
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Playing
Cards
You
" It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so. "
Josh Billings
Know
Than
Nothing
" There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory. "
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Mistake
Memory
Funny
" I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money. "
Josh Billings
Much
Money
Got
" Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere, wide awake, on tiptoe. "
Josh Billings
Everywhere
Wisdom
Learning
" Don't ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it. "
Josh Billings
You
Remember
Nobody
" Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do. "
Josh Billings
Blind
Love Is
Said
" Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel. "
Josh Billings
Pay
Be Kind
Good
" There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply. "
Josh Billings
Experience
Learn
Nothing
" The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout. "
Josh Billings
Lord
Gout
Medicine
" One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can. "
Josh Billings
He
Best
Things
" One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness; a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs. "
Josh Billings
Never
Best
Who
" It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit. "
Josh Billings
Sins
Much
Easier
" No one can disgrace us but ourselves. "
Josh Billings
Ourselves
Us
Disgrace
" About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it. "
Josh Billings
Difference
Rich
Poor
" Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got. "
Josh Billings
Man
Most
Interesting
" Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed. "
Josh Billings
Like
Funny
Cologne
" Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does. "
Josh Billings
Reason
Never
Conscience
" As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. "
Josh Billings
Truth Is
Always
Demand
" There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness. "
Josh Billings
Forgiveness
Complete
Revenge
" The road to ruin is always in good repair, and the travellers pay the expense of it. "
Josh Billings
Good
Always
Ruin