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" Men don't hear women. "

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" There's obviously a group who enjoys what Tyler Perry is putting out there. And why fault them? And there's a group that loves the things that Spike does. So they should enjoy that, too. Is it my taste? Maybe not, but I'm not going to fault anybody for doing what they're doing as long as people are showing up. "

" I have a sidekick, Keith Robinson, who's very funny. I've known Keith for over 20 years; he's my best friend. "

" If a topic hits me, I'll start going on it. But you can't force it. "

" There's so many good comedians in D.C. I started hanging out with those guys. Dave Chappelle was there. Actually, Dave was too young to be in the clubs, so when his mom couldn't make it, he would ask me to pretend I was his aunt, so he could do open mike. "

" What drives the creative person is that we see it all. "

" My worlds collide. When one things happens, it just starts a domino effect - everything else goes on. "

" I'm really funny now. "

" It wasn't until after the reduction that in the lab work, the pathology, that they found that I had DCIS (ductal carcinoma in situ) in my left breast. I was very, very lucky because DCIS is basically stage-zero cancer. So I was very lucky. "

" If I did a talk show, this would allow me to speak on what's happening at that moment. I can be current, and I get to flex my stand-up muscle but stay at home without doing the traveling. "

" A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh. "

" Men are dogs. Men are dogs. We got to stop it. Men are not dogs. Uh-uh. Dogs are loyal. "

" I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing. "

" I'm here today because I hated everything else. "

" I have problems with YouTube and things like that, when you catch it mid production. If I'm doing a show and I'm working on a bit and someone's there with a phone, they record it and put it online - it's not the finished product. "

" I'm a huge Sia fan. I love Sia, I have just about all of her stuff. "

" I couldn't believe that Donald Trump won. I couldn't believe that we elected an orangutan to front the country. "

" Stand-up, by far, is my favorite. "

" I have a lot of breast cancer history on my mother's side of the family. "

" I knew I was outspoken when I was a kid because, whenever my parents had company coming over, they would pay me to leave. 'Go see your grandmother. Get out of here.' That was my first paying gig. "

" Sometimes black people really want to hold onto our oppression - 'This is ours! This belongs to us.' You can't just talk about equality for somebody else. Let's pass it on. Let's pass it on to somebody else. At the end of the day, it is all about inequality. "

" In this business, you get an opportunity, and you pounce on it. "

" People are getting careers from YouTube and uploading videos. And they're totally different - you can't necessarily be funny on a video, and then all of a sudden you're live in a theater. You don't have the tools yet. It's a lot more involved to go from being funny on a little iPhone screen to being live in front of people and being funny. "

" I had real big boobs, and I just got tired of knocking over stuff. Every time I eat, 'Oh, Lord'. I'd carry a Tide stick everywhere I go. My back was sore, so it was time to have a reduction. "

" I really can't pinpoint the one moment when I said I want to be a comic. "

" People are going to label you anyway, but the one that bugs me the most is when they say, 'One of the funniest female comedians.' There's s no 'funniest male comedians.' You're either a funny comedian, or you're not! "

" I have to be socially aware; I feel like that's my job. "

" I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone. "

" And then also I think it's harder for women because comedy is so opposite of being ladylike. "

" To me, in life, if there's, like, a rule, and I think it's ridiculous, then of course I'll circumvent that but also point out how ridiculous the rule is. Other than that, if I go to a concert, and my seat is Row G, Seat 12, I'm sitting in Row G, Seat 12. I don't care if I'm with five other friends, I'm supposed to be in Seat 12, that's my seat. "

" If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you. "