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" Never marry because it seems like what you should do. "

Emily V. Gordon

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" Everybody's got baggage, and not just the classic, 'Oh I have so much baggage,' but everyone comes with so much context, and you're not just dating a person: you're dating all their context, too. Part of relationships is negotiating each other's context. "

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" People get married for a wide array of reasons and have all sorts of expectations of how marriage will change the relationship. And while it's true that turning the person you're dating into a legal partner does affect certain things, those who expect marriage to be a cure-all for all your relationship woes are sorely mistaken. "

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" I'm tired of hearing about 'Damages,' I don't care how life-changing 'The Wire' is, and I don't want to hear another word about 'Battlestar Galactica' or its super-awesome ending. "

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" Unequivocally, individual human beings who live together will always have different standards of what a 'clean house' looks like. "

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" Without knowing your own history, you are doomed to repeat it. "

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" Do remember to pick your battles when you start parenting your stepchildren. "

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" When we each focus on being the dominant force in our own universe rather than invading other universes, we all win. "

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" Men - not all men but a good majority of the ones I have known and worked with - tend to think of difficult situations in their lives as problems that need to be solved. "

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" Sometimes we put so much effort into things we're doing, like dating or wedding planning, that we don't stop to think about whether or not we even want the results of that effort. "

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" Post-divorce, the world can feel harsh and full of jagged edges. "

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" I am somewhat grateful to the disintegration of my marriage for teaching me a lot about myself and about relationships, and though I wish it hadn't been such a taxing lesson, I wouldn't change a thing. "

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" If a show is wickedly, hugely popular, like 'Mad Men,' I assume that the masses, in their infinite inferiority to me, don't know what good TV is and that everyone is just brainwashed. "

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" Your life story is a gift, and it should be treated as such. "

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" Nothing makes me feel more mushy and full of love for my husband than going back and looking at our flirtation unfolding online. I love reading our old e-mails, texts, and Gchats. "

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" Parents go to sleep early. This is universal. "

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" I am fairly convinced that people plan destination weddings because they would actually like to elope but want to have given you the option to attend. "

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" When someone insists that you watch a show that's already been on for a few seasons, they're basically saying, 'Hey, you're not doing anything for the next five weeks, are you? Because have I got a plan for you every single night! It's 'Weeds!'' "

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" Ghosts of Marriages Past can haunt many aspects of a new relationship - your expectations of what a man should do, how you behave in conflict, your ideas of how commitment should look - they can even make your new man look untrustworthy when he's really behaving normally. "

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" I had a tightly knit group of female friends in elementary school - we called ourselves the Sensational Six. "

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" Marriage will not change your spouse. It will not make him or her more mature, more loyal to you, or better at housework. "

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" When I was young and less wise, I thought that being a feminist meant being independent. It meant not sacrificing your needs for anyone else's and not relying on anyone else for even a smidgen of your happiness or well being. "

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" I'm a mental-health advocate big time, so I think it's great when depression is a thing that's discussed out in the open, because it's still way too stigmatized. "

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" I think it's lovely when people are more involved in local politics. "

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" Often, when cheating happens, we rush to place blame solely on one person - either the person who did the cheating, or more insidiously, if it happened to us, we blame ourselves for not being 'good enough' to keep them around. But putting it all on one person doesn't paint the entire picture. "

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" As my marriage was slowly dissolving into silent meals and awkward nights of avoiding conversation, I started pondering an unmarried future and wondered if I'd ever be able to hack being single again. "

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" If you've experienced cheating in a new marriage, the real work is not obsessively combing through all the details of what happened, but rather figuring out if your relationship is worth saving. "

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" Awkward conversations are painful, but they're way easier than divorce, resentment, and heartbreak. "

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