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" Stand-up is the foundation to my career. It's what I started out doing. "

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" My older brother was born, who was a cripple, then I was born, and my sister was born, the only girl. So I was between the only girl and the crippled guy. I was the middle guy. "

" I do comedy for real people. "

" Most people don't know what's happening around them because they're just speeding through life. And before they know it, they're just old. So I just try to slow it down. "

" To me, politics is a pile of tricks. "

" As a child, I was able to know that I wanted a better life. "

" If you're the kind of person who likes numbers and statistics, I'm the long shot - the Lotto Powerball winner. I'm the mutation in the DNA that makes evolution a reality. I am the new black. "

" Having boys is different. Boys, you put sneakers on, and they're out, they're ready. Girls, you gotta pay a little bit more attention to them. "

" I don't need no stool and mike stand. I don't need all of that to be funny. I've been funny my whole life. This is a gift God gave me. I spread love wherever I'm at. I'm like Marvin Gaye. "

" People walked out on Richard Pryor and he's the funniest man alive. "

" My fans would love to see Brian Fellow come back. I love my fans. And they like my edge. "

" My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality. "

" I don't see myself as angry, although other people see that. I just see myself as a short, dumpy guy with bad feet, and I'm passionate. "

" I'm human, I feel, I understand. That's the highest level of love, is understanding - when you can understand someone, when you can love them with their flaws and their faults. So I understand, I consider. I may speak the truth, but I'll consider your feelings, too. "

" I'm a human being. I feel all emotions. I'm not just happy all the time. Sometimes, I'm sad and feel the blues. Sometimes I even want to feel the blues. Sometimes, you want to feel down. "

" I love my mother. My mother made sure, her stubbornness - she made sure we was going to eat. She made sure we had Christmases. That was my mother. My father wasn't there for that. "

" If you can survive 'Saturday Night Live,' then you're good as far as show business is concerned. "

" I have a pretty diverse audience, and that makes me happy - laughter is universal, and I don't differentiate between people at all. Why should I? People are people. There's no reason why one person can't relate to any other person on this planet in some way or another. "

" I've got friends who want money but don't want to do anything to earn it. "

" There aren't a lot of guys out there keeping it real. Everybody's been branded. Everybody's been bought and sold. "

" I'm a black man in America, so I'm going to be misunderstood. "

" Comedians are the monkeys of acting. When you go to the zoo, everybody loves the monkey exhibit. "

" I mellowed out; my daughter mellowed me out, and I don't get mad at anyone. "

" I'm not a child star, but you could say that I've grown up on TV. I went from being an unknown, down-and-out comic from Brooklyn and the Bronx to being a regular character on a major network comedy called 'Martin.' From there I went on to become the most notable black comic on 'Saturday Night Live' since Eddie Murphy. "

" I have friends who are black, white, purple, gay, straight, Martian, yellow, old, and young. I have friends who are animals and a few who I believe to be robots. All of them are people to me. In my mind, it's not about what you look like or what you do; it's about who you are inside. "

" You get somebody to crack a smile, that's a beautiful thing. "

" If I make fun of somebody at my show, believe me, it's something we can all laugh at. "

" I do my best creating on stage. "

" If we all had a little bit of Michael Jackson in us, I think it would make the world a better place. "

" Some people believe everything they see on TV. People, it's called tel-lie-vision! "

" If you can get your life down to one minute at a time, you don't miss anything. You have total abundance of information and material. "