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" I've got friends who want money but don't want to do anything to earn it. "

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" I just want to be funny, I just want to do comedy. "

" I'm art. You're art. We are God's greatest works, simple as that. "

" It gets scary when you're dealing with people who don't know how to separate fact from fiction. "

" There's ups and downs of any job. If you worked at the post office, there's ups and downs. You have your good days, and you have your bad days. If you're a housewife, you have your good days, and you have your bad days. "

" I had a great time working on 'Saturday Night Live.' It was one of the important times in my life. "

" If I gamble, I'll play roulette. My wife and I will play roulette, and that's about it. I'm not a heavy gambler. "

" There's nothing in the world like live entertainment. With TV, you have to wait for your results; with live entertainment, people let you know right then and there. That relationship is established in 30 seconds. The first 30 seconds, they'll let you know whether they like you or not. "

" Where I came from, people couldn't afford to go to the theatre. "

" What you have to understand is that my thing is not glamour. I love stretch marks and C-section scars and all of that. I'm a grown man. You don't gotta put on no makeup with me. "

" It's very important to be in your child's life and know what's going on and be there with them. "

" No one set that I ever do is the same. I mean, if I go to a comedy club, and I perform three sets, all three sets are different because anything can happen in between sets. "

" So I think all comedians are earning their wings into heaven. We're all going to heaven, but everybody's not going to get their wings. Some people are just going to be regular angels. Doing cleanup, janitor work. In heaven, I'm going to sit on the couch with Oprah. "

" No matter what, if my son was gay, I'd treat him like a king. "

" Sometimes I think we're exposed to things we shouldn't be exposed to too early. I think that sets the tone to a person's whole life. Trauma. "

" If you can get your life down to one minute at a time, you don't miss anything. You have total abundance of information and material. "

" Comedy clubs are sacred ground. That's where anything goes. "

" My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality. "

" I'm a black man in America, so I'm going to be misunderstood. "

" If she's not spoken for, and you come at her correctly, like a man, she'll get with you. "

" Bad news travels at the speed of light; good news travels like molasses. "

" People bring camera phones into comedy shows and clubs and concerts, and sound bites never come out right. "

" I don't need no stool and mike stand. I don't need all of that to be funny. I've been funny my whole life. This is a gift God gave me. I spread love wherever I'm at. I'm like Marvin Gaye. "

" I'm around my kids every day. I'm regular. We're a regular family. My wife cooks, she washes clothes, I read books, I pump my own gas, I get my own hair cut. "

" We need to learn to laugh at ourselves because when you don't laugh, you cry. And I don't feel like crying. "

" America doesn't like to hear about things like welfare. 'Don't talk about that. We don't like what it did to people!' Yeah, but it happened. "

" God gave us dreams, but he gave us kids to make all those dreams worthwhile. And when I look at all my kids, I say everything that I've ever went through in my life was worthwhile. "

" In my heart, I really don't care who you love, same sex or not; as long as you have the ability to love, that's the important thing here. "

" Reality is the scary thing. Not my work, not comedy. "

" The only person who knows what's in my wallet is my wife. "

" Yeah, race exists. Racism is still here, and it's doing well. Turn on the news. I don't think me and my comedy can really change that. "