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" There's something about Marxism that brings out warts; the only kind of growth this economic system encourages. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Only
Economic
Growth
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" The minute somebody joins a committee... they immediately suffer from committee brain. They become wildly over-enthusiastic, over-optimistic, over-pessimistic. Committees turn people into idiots, and politics is a committee. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politics
People
Brain
" You're never going to read 'The Wealth of Nations,' and you shouldn't, really. It's 900 pages. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Read
Nations
Never
" Charles McCarry is the best modern writer on the subject of intrigue - by the breadth of Alan Furst, by the fathom of Eric Ambler, by any measure. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Measure
Intrigue
Best
" You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
People
Money
" Jimmy Carter was - he still - he remains to this day America's most ex of ex-presidents. You just can't believe that we elected this doofus. He was a bright enough guy and sort of well-meaning. But he was about as prepared to be president of the United States as your goofy old uncle, you know, the one that memorises baseball statistics. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Believe
Day
America
" As a former writer for the 'National Lampoon,' I've probably contributed to the sea of sarcasm in which we live. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Live
Sarcasm
Writer
" There are selves too big for one person to contain. You cannot call them selfish. There is nothing -ish about such selves. They are the self, as it were, itself. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
Nothing
Big
" I am unboreable in the great outdoors. "
P. J. O'Rourke
I Am
Am
Great
" The bar is set pretty low if you want to be a hip, accessible conservative. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Bar
Conservative
Pretty
" I'm a member of the 1960s generation. We didn't have any wisdom. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Wisdom
1960s
Any
" Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Death
Die
Good
" There are a few things that people all around the world need to admit to themselves. Trade restraints slow economic growth, the euro is not a reserve currency, and scoreless sports ties are boring. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Sports
World
Slow
" Democrats hate success. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Democrats
Success
Hate
" My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Two
Family
Irish
" I myself am a parent in a small business. Number of employees: one. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Business
Small
Employees
" Voting has proliferated in the United States, and it has reached a point where there is now almost one vote available per citizen over the age of eighteen. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Voting
Over
Age
" Some people think that welfare reform should have hurt Bill Clinton with black voters. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Black
Think
Some People
" There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Die
Women
Take
" Upbeat is for people who want to feel good about their cause: the reformers, the progressives, the revolutionaries, the utopians, the collectivists, and the rest of the altruistic scum of the earth. Why do these people want to feel good? They want to feel good in order to convince themselves that they are good. "
P. J. O'Rourke
People
Earth
Good
" We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Need
Nature
Government
" In thirteen years, every aspect of the universe can change - ask a thirteen-year-old. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Change
Years
Universe
" The only advantage to being a middle-aged man is that when you put on a jacket and tie, you're the Scary Dad. Never mind that no one has had an actually scary dad since 1966. The visceral fear remains. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Scary
You
Fear
" America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Pleased
Well
Anything
" Wealth brings great benefits to the world. Rich people are heros. "
P. J. O'Rourke
World
Great
People
" There are a number of Americans who shouldn't vote. The number is 57 percent, to judge by the combined total of Clinton and Perot ballots in the 1996 presidential election. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Percent
Vote
Number
" I was very much in favor of the Iraq invasion. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Much
Very
Invasion
" Space has always been confusing to politics. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Always
Space
Politics
" I like to have interesting things to write about. And when one says something is 'interesting,' one almost always means 'bad.' "
P. J. O'Rourke
Bad
Like
Interesting
" Democrats hate America being a world power because world power gives power to the nation instead of to Democrats. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Hate
Nation
Power
" People love to be told what they know already. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Know
People
Love