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" I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance. "

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" I had breast cancer. Yeah, I know it's scary. "

" I worked with people like Edward Snowden. Well, not people who took stuff home. "

" I really can't pinpoint the one moment when I said I want to be a comic. "

" I couldn't believe that Donald Trump won. I couldn't believe that we elected an orangutan to front the country. "

" If you feel like there's something out there that you're supposed to be doing, if you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it. "

" I had real big boobs, and I just got tired of knocking over stuff. Every time I eat, 'Oh, Lord'. I'd carry a Tide stick everywhere I go. My back was sore, so it was time to have a reduction. "

" Sometimes black people really want to hold onto our oppression - 'This is ours! This belongs to us.' You can't just talk about equality for somebody else. Let's pass it on. Let's pass it on to somebody else. At the end of the day, it is all about inequality. "

" I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too. "

" I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business. "

" But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that. "

" It's hard to get fired from the government. You have to, like, kill people. "

" I like doing a bunch of different things, being all over the place. "

" I remember, when I was a kid, my summers were pretty much running around, riding your bike, and then complaining about you were bored. "

" Stand-up, by far, is my favorite. "

" Actually, I majored in marketing and I have a bachelor of science. "

" I have a very diverse crowd from old, young, black, white, straight, gay. It's a little bit of everybody. "

" When I'm not on T.V. or working on a movie, I'm on the road doing stand-up. That's my roots. "

" What drives the creative person is that we see it all. "

" Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going. "

" Men don't hear women. "

" I'm a stand-up comic. I'm always doing dates; it's just that, if I'm working on a project or I'm busy, I can't get out on the road or book any shows. Since the beginning of my career, I'm usually out for at least 10-15 dates throughout the year. If I have time, then I try to get at least 30-40 dates. "

" I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing. "

" There's obviously a group who enjoys what Tyler Perry is putting out there. And why fault them? And there's a group that loves the things that Spike does. So they should enjoy that, too. Is it my taste? Maybe not, but I'm not going to fault anybody for doing what they're doing as long as people are showing up. "

" I have to be socially aware; I feel like that's my job. "

" People are going to label you anyway, but the one that bugs me the most is when they say, 'One of the funniest female comedians.' There's s no 'funniest male comedians.' You're either a funny comedian, or you're not! "

" If I'm talking about something current, a current issue or something political, it's because I was able to read it when I was on the plane getting to the gig... a lot of it happens when I'm on the road because when I'm home, you're just mom, and that's it. "

" The first time onstage, a light went on. 'OK, this is my thing. I'm comfortable here. This is my thing.' "

" If you're passionate about your work, it makes the people around you want to be involved too. "

" It wasn't until after the reduction that in the lab work, the pathology, that they found that I had DCIS (ductal carcinoma in situ) in my left breast. I was very, very lucky because DCIS is basically stage-zero cancer. So I was very lucky. "

" I love working with other actors and other people - you know, stand-up - it's lonely; it's just you out there and the audience. But it's fun working with other actors. I love doing that, too. "