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" I'm not one of those guys who wants to die on a stage. "

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" I call myself an actor. I always wanted to be one. "

" What keeps me going is that young people still want to see me. "

" I like to think I'm like the guy who goes to the office Christmas party Friday night, insults some people, but still has his job Monday morning. "

" The highlight of my career was being at the inaugural gala of Ronald Reagan, and I owe that to Mr. Sinatra. "

" My wife came into my life, and my mother still wanted to be the boss. "

" I have my own gym. When you do jokes and they sell, you get a gym. "

" I did a few movies, but the word 'star'... I cannot compare to a star like Clint Eastwood. I used to call Clint 'Larry Dickman' when he would come to my show; then, he started using the name when he would go under cover in a 'Dirty Harry' movie. That's why he's a movie star... he's so creative. "

" You got to have a lot of courage. Secondly, whatever it is you're doing, you have to believe in it wholeheartedly. Thirdly, you have to be able to stand up in front of people and know that they'll laugh. "

" I was always the guy who made jokes and ribbed people at parties. After I went to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts I got sidetracked into clubs and started doing comedy. "

" If I were to insult people and mean it, that wouldn't be funny. "

" When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last. "

" Everything I've performed has been from my own head. "

" The man I adored, and miss him terribly, was Johnny Carson. "

" Bob Newhart, who is my best friend, is one of the guys I adore. "

" When you do comedy, you can't please the world, although I'd like to think that most of my audiences were on my side. "

" I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room. "

" My wife, Barbara, is great. She arranges when I do work that I have a day off between performances. "

" I've been hot, I've been lukewarm, I've been freezing, but I've always been a headliner. "

" I couldn't sell air conditioners on a 98-degree day. When I demonstrated them in a showroom, I pushed the wrong button and blew the circuit. "

" Sinatra was somebody special. "

" I never went out looking for glory. "

" Among my friends, I'm not a little Boy Scout, and they love my humor, thank God. "

" My grandchildren just know me now as Mr. Potato Head. "

" Many, many years ago, I stood on the stage and told bad jokes and did Sophie Tucker as an impersonation, and nobody looked up; and suddenly, I looked down and said, 'Sir, I'm getting fed up with you. Either you watch, or I'm going to suck your neck,' or words to that effect, and suddenly people started to laugh. "

" I busted my bird for 60 years in the business, but my grandkids only know me as Mr. Potato Head. "

" Bob Hope was totally regimented. I go in and say a line like, 'Hi Bob' and I'd have to do it five times, and then Bob would take me to the writers to say the line different ways. He wouldn't let me ad-lib. "

" My life was in Montreal years ago. Best food in the world. "

" I still have drive, but everything is relative. "

" You've got to be able to sell yourself. "

" I was a big shot in high school - big into social events and at the dramatic society - and I always had trouble in school. Not because I was a dummy, but I was always busy being the Jackson Heights clown. "