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" Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose. "

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" I don't have a college degree, and my father didn't have a college degree, so when my son, Zachary, graduated from college, I said, 'My boy's got learnin'!' "

" My style is bad white-boy dancing. I can do swing a little bit, but nothing beyond that. My solo dancing is sad. I use my arms, badly. "

" Having George W. Bush giving a lecture on business ethics is like having a leper give you a facial, it just doesn't work! "

" The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery. "

Second Amendment

" Being in the same room with people and creating something together is a good thing. "

" In the process of looking for comedy, you have to be deeply honest. And in doing that, you'll find out here's the other side. You'll be looking under the rock occasionally for the laughter. "

" I knew Matt Damon and Ben Affleck were really talented. As actors, they were both studly young men, and they had great writers' chops. "

" If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. "

" In 'The Secret Agent,' it's basically a character that was admired by Theodore Kaczynski, which is some fan mail you don't really want to open. This is a man who is a chemist and who specializes in making bombs and despises humanity. "

" Tweets? That stuff kills conversation. And people taking pictures with their phone or recording you, sometimes surreptitiously, is creepy. They come up and just start talking to you, and you can see the red light on their phone. "

" I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone. "

" What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong. "

" I loved school, maybe too much, really. I was summa cum laude in high school. I was driven that way. "

" When Jonathan Winters died, it was like, 'Oh, man!' I knew he was frail, but I always thought he was going to last longer. I knew him as being really funny, but at the same time, he had a dark side. "

" It's hard when you read an article saying bad things about you. It is as if someone is sticking a knife on your heart. But I am the harshest critic of my work. "

" I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. "

" I was only a leading man for a minute; now I'm a character actor. "

" You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks. "

" The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?' "

" There's a show in America where all these people compete with ferrets, and they don't even do anything. They basically just hold them up, and if they don't bite you, they might win. "

" I bought one of the first Nintendo systems and brought that home, and we were playing 'Legend of Zelda' at the time, and it was addicting, and I was playing it for hours and hours and hours. "

" The idea of having a steady job is appealing. "

" Politics is so personal, vicious and immediate, how are you going to get anything done? Even the local politics where I live have gotten so ugly. "

" I'm much more open to being a supporting actor right now. At the age of 60, I'll be second fiddle. Fine. I'm happy to do it. "

" You can start any 'Monty Python' routine and people finish it for you. Everyone knows it like shorthand. "

" I do believe in love; it's wonderful - especially love third time around, it's even more precious; it's kind of amazing. "

" I think 'Dead Poets' was probably my favorite, just to get started with the idea of doing a movie that people treated as more than a movie. "

" I don't do well with snakes and I can't dance. "

" Sometimes over things that I did, movies that didn't turn out very well - you go, 'Why did you do that?' But in the end, I can't regret them because I met amazing people. There was always something that was worth it. "

" I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you. "