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" TV is chewing gum for the eyes. "

Frank Lloyd Wright

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" I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time. "

Charles M. Schulz

" If you are doing stand-up comedy, you have to be confident in what you are doing. That doesn't mean just because you are confident you are funny. "

Judah Friedlander

" Lana Turner was adorable and funny. Jimmy Stewart was such a nice person. I quickly realized that if you're not a nice person, you're not going to last in this business. I mean, once your box office starts to drop off, like Veronica Lake, they'll get rid of you fast. "

" I would talk in iambic pentameter if it were easier. "

" I saw a stationery store move. "

" It's funny, because what happens to me when I read a script, when something grabs hold of me, I start getting these flashes of people or places or things or images. "

" We owe to the Middle Ages the two worst inventions of humanity - romantic love and gunpowder. "

" I actually think of being funny as an odd turn of mind, like a mild disability, some weird way of looking at the world that you can't get rid of. "

" It's such a funny thing when you see your daughter transitioning from your baby, your little girl, to suddenly being a young woman. If you're not really looking for it, you can miss it, and Lily-Rose is on that road already, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. "

" I wasn't close to my father, but I wanted to be all my life. He had a funny sense of humor, and he laughed all the time - good and loud, like I do. He was a gay Irish gentleman and very good-looking. And he wanted to be close to me, too, but we never had much time together. "

" Most of my show is true; like, 90% of everything I say on stage is true. I just have to find the way to make it funny - that's the difficult thing. "

" Although I have guitars all around, and I pick them up occasionally and write a tune and make a record, I don't really see myself as a musician. It may seem a funny thing to say. It's just like, I write lyrics, and I make up songs, but I'm not a great lyricist or songwriter or producer. It's when you put all these things together - that makes me. "

George Harrison

" I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead. "

" My mother was a nurse, and in her era, most diseases weren't understood; people put mustard plasters on knees and rubbed camphor on your chest if you had a cough and did funny things to you if you had tuberculosis - all these things that really made very little difference once proper treatments were brought in. "

" I'm fascinated with the stories that we tell. Real histories become fantasies and fairy tales, morality tales and fables. There's something interesting and funny and perverse about the way fairytale sometimes passes for history, for truth. "

" I read a funny story about how the Republicans freed the slaves. The Republicans are the ones who created slavery by law in the 1600's. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves and he was not a Republican. "

" I'm just not one of those naturally funny, relaxed actors who enjoy the spotlight and are so good at it. "

" A great architect is not made by way of a brain nearly so much as he is made by way of a cultivated, enriched heart. "

Frank Lloyd Wright

" It's funny: your happiness is contingent on a bigger picture besides just yourself. "

" Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything! "

" The present is the ever moving shadow that divides yesterday from tomorrow. In that lies hope. "

Frank Lloyd Wright

" I did 'Love's Labour's Lost' in the theater and found it to be riotously funny. "

Kenneth Branagh

" All men are equal before fish. "

" 'Danger Girl' can be ridiculous, but sometimes it's funny. "

" I'm not funny. What I am is brave. "

" There are so many funny women in the world, and there has been for so many years, so I'll be happy when people can just move on from that, and things can just be 'comedies' and not 'female' or 'male,' and everyone gets an equal opportunity. "

" I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn't like me for being... me. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" You know, what's funny to one person is not at all to someone else. "

" A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book. "

Ernest Hemingway

" My kind of wanting to be funny didn't come from need, necessarily. The closest I can analyze it is that it was an easy way to make friends, I found out. It was just a great kind of social tool. "