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" A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book. "

Ernest Hemingway

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" Cowardice... is almost always simply a lack of ability to suspend functioning of the imagination. "

Ernest Hemingway

" If you're funny, if there's something that makes you laugh, then every day's going to be okay. "

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" The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have. "

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Ernest Hemingway

" The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. "

" I like marriage. The idea. "

" Being funny is everything to me. "

" If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving. "

" I can really stir up a conversation. Every time I go to a meeting or a casting, I try to make it as light and funny as I can. I'm always making really awkward jokes. You have to make life fun and not take it too seriously. I may look like I'm very serious and into my work, but if you knew me, I'm just a jokester. "

Charlotte McKinney

" It's funny what memory does, isn't it? My favorite holiday tradition might not have happened more than once or twice. But because it is such a good memory, so encapsulating of everything I love about the holidays, in my mind it happened every year. Without fail. "

" We want to be funny. We want to make people laugh... We'll do whatever it takes. "

" My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.' Funny thought. "

" Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed. "

" Maori get pigeonholed into the idea they're spiritual and telling stories like 'Whale Rider' and 'Once Were Warriors,' quite serious stuff, but we're pretty funny people, and we never really have had an opportunity to show that side of ourselves, the clumsy, nerdy side of ourselves, which is something I am. "

" Without hurting anybody, we all tend to laugh at others' discomfort. When someone slips on a banana skin and falls it's funny. "

" If you're public speaking, imagine yourself feeling confident; if you're nervous about a date and thinking, 'I'm gonna be a dork,' picture yourself being funny. Then it will be familiar to your brain. "

Lindsey Stirling

" People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat! "

" Do you know, it's funny, but I never thought of being blind as a disadvantage, and I never thought of being black as a disadvantage. "

" Chris Hemsworth is like Christopher Reeve in that he can do two things: he can wear a big red cape without a shred of self-consciousness. But he's also funny as hell, and he's so sweet. So with all the fish-out-of-water stuff, he's so funny. So he does almost two jobs in a way. "

" Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else? "

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" I never had to choose a subject - my subject rather chose me. "

Ernest Hemingway

" I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host. "

David Letterman

" The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places. "

Ernest Hemingway

" The funny thing about directing is that you have your own opinions, but it's a collaboration. Directing is a group effort. Even though you might think something works, the smartest thing you can do as a director is try and weigh the opinions of the people around you. "

" I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead. "