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" I always like to have a buffer between me and journalism in general. Not just a reporter, but journalism. "

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" It's much better to wreak havoc on a show and be a maniac than promote myself. Plugs and anecdotes aren't really in line with my beliefs. Besides, if someone sees me on a morning show and thinks, 'That's not funny; this guy is crazy,' then I don't want them to come to the show anyway. "

" It's always fun to agree to be in a movie when you have no idea what it's actually going to be! "

" I wouldn't want to be Superman. Batman would be cool. But the one I've always wanted to play is the Joker. There is a maniacal and dangerous side to me. "

" Comedy gives you a shot of euphoria that distracts you from everything that's awful. "

" Always remember: My general theme is 'There is no message.' There never has been. Stop trying to find the message or the meaning in everything. That's. My. Theme. "

" I can't stand Snapchat, but that will be extinct before it is relevant. "

" I actually prefer Twitter as a medium, and I also got into Periscope for a second, but I'm still trying to figure out what to do with it. I can't figure out if the only important thing about it is the live broadcast, or if it's an interesting kind of way to log what you do. "

" We try and reflect that there's a lot of optimism, there's a lot of positive things that are happening in 'Silicon Valley'. "

" It doesn't matter to me if I'm in love with my performance, so I watch all of my performances to understand and learn from them and figure out what's working and what's not. And I see the movies that I'm in in the theater a lot. "

" Some people in Silicon Valley are as bad as the 'Koch Brothers', you know? Don't be mistaken. For every some of those, though, you get people who come up with something like 'Leafly', which does what 'Yelp' has done, but in a much more specific way, and it's important because it's the dawn of this new era. "

" One of the exciting things about an entanglement puzzle is there's no end to it. Once you solve how to take it apart, you have to solve how to put it back together. "

" 'Yogi Bear' changed my life in ways that I can't explain because it's not a full feature on me. 'Yogi Bear' - there's everything before 'Yogi Bear,' and there's everything after 'Yogi Bear.' Like a major car accident, or the birth of Christ. "

" I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff. "

" There's nothing I would love more than to host an awards show where I'm nominated for an award - that is so funny to me. "

" Everybody asks me what it was like to be in my underwear for my network television debut. "

" Life is hard. Not great. Kind of tragic. "

" Slowly but surely, I went through different phases of fame, and each rises you further into isolation and alienation. "

" Funny is as funny does, and funny puts on a walrus mask and slowly gyrates in a mall food court. I laugh at absurdity hardest, then stories, then observations, then bearded men on roller skates. "

" I have perfectly symmetrical ankles. "

" I don't sit and write stand-up material; I come up with an idea onstage. "

" I think I'm just a comedian who's a pretty good con man, and I don't see that changing any time soon. "

" Every time I could possibly be doing stand up, I am. "

" I care less about selling tickets and getting Twitter followers than I do about making as many people laugh as I can. I'd rather make people laugh than make them know who T.J. Miller is. "

" We're not a nation divided: we're a nation broken, and anything broken can be fixed. "

" I would say that awards are for children. Because children need a tangible representation of their achievement. And as adults, you have to settle for the respect and admiration of your peers. "

" I try to be an ethical, moral person and a nice person, and I like to have that reflected in my comedy. I'm not a mean comedian, and I don't think that my comedy is mean. I think that for the most part, it's more focused on the diversity that we all handle and try to provide a distraction from the disaster of modern living. "

" I feel like I've forcefully been thrust into the tech world, and I've enjoyed every minute of it. "

" It is good to connect to someone who reminds you that you have some real authenticity. "

" I love writing but not crazy meticulous/prepared enough to be a director. I'd work as a gaffer on something. "

" Mike Judge is my Jonathan Swift, and I say that because I don't know any other satirists. But the problem with satire is that it's so easily misinterpreted. "