Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" I think I'm just a comedian who's a pretty good con man, and I don't see that changing any time soon. "

Related Quotes:

" I always like to have a buffer between me and journalism in general. Not just a reporter, but journalism. "

" My face is oblong. But the best grooming is confidence. "

" Slowly but surely, I went through different phases of fame, and each rises you further into isolation and alienation. "

" It is good to connect to someone who reminds you that you have some real authenticity. "

" I do comedy to give people an ephemeral escape from the tragedy that permeates everyday life. "

" We try and reflect that there's a lot of optimism, there's a lot of positive things that are happening in 'Silicon Valley'. "

" Comedy gives you a shot of euphoria that distracts you from everything that's awful. "

" People dream their whole lives of their Oscar speech; I dreamt my whole life of hosting the Oscars. "

" Most things I get hired on, I get hired because I improvise something funny, or they just think I look weird. "

" I don't know how much the economy has changed since Jonathan Swift's 'A Modest Proposal.' "

" The moment in which you make somebody laugh, you're only doing it to make them laugh and be happy. Then afterward you can be like, 'Oh, I just want the attention. I feel so good that everybody's listening to me and I got the approval that I need.' "

" Stuff that I write isn't as similar to the stuff that I'm in, but I don't really care. I just do comedy. "

" I don't believe in alcohol. It's a sort of a medicinal necessity for the human condition, none of that stuff. I'm not a gambling man. "

" When you get into a car, and there's trash, or it's dirty, or one of the hubcaps is off, you're like, 'Come on, dude.' Every woman likes the confidence and self-respect that says, 'I get oil changes. I look after my vehicle.' That's what I recommend: Act like you don't care, but take care of your body. "

" Hosting is a thankless job. "

" I don't really know how to act that much. I'm quite good at comedy, but it's mostly acting naturally. "

" There's nothing I would love more than to host an awards show where I'm nominated for an award - that is so funny to me. "

" To be honest, I would never have imagined myself acting on a sitcom that I didn't write. "

" I have perfectly symmetrical ankles. "

" Life is hard. Not great. Kind of tragic. "

" By the very nature of satire or parody, you have to love and respect your target and respect it enough to understand every aspect of it, so you can more effectively make fun of it. "

" My father always said I have a face for radio, and 'Cloverfield' was one of my finest pieces of work. "

" One of the exciting things about an entanglement puzzle is there's no end to it. Once you solve how to take it apart, you have to solve how to put it back together. "

" I'm a Nietzschean scholar. I've read an immense amount about nihilism and existentialism. "

" I like hip-hop, but I don't like concerts. There's, like, sweat on people's backs. "

" You just put yourself into your work, and you can do anything you want, depending on how hard you want to work for it. "

" I would say that awards are for children. Because children need a tangible representation of their achievement. And as adults, you have to settle for the respect and admiration of your peers. "

" Everybody asks me what it was like to be in my underwear for my network television debut. "

" Funny is as funny does, and funny puts on a walrus mask and slowly gyrates in a mall food court. I laugh at absurdity hardest, then stories, then observations, then bearded men on roller skates. "

" I can't stand Snapchat, but that will be extinct before it is relevant. "