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" I was the Head Boy of East High School in 1999. I represent 303 - the area code, not the band - Mile High, until I die. I'm 31, a comedian; I juggle, but I don't glove it. I think waxed mustaches run a very thin line between hipster and 1800s barkeep. "

T. J. Miller

Die

Run

School

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" I'm a Nietzschean scholar. I've read an immense amount about nihilism and existentialism. "

" I have perfectly symmetrical ankles. "

" I don't really know how to act that much. I'm quite good at comedy, but it's mostly acting naturally. "

" 'Yogi Bear' changed my life in ways that I can't explain because it's not a full feature on me. 'Yogi Bear' - there's everything before 'Yogi Bear,' and there's everything after 'Yogi Bear.' Like a major car accident, or the birth of Christ. "

T. J. Miller

My Life

Bear

" I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff. "

" The moment in which you make somebody laugh, you're only doing it to make them laugh and be happy. Then afterward you can be like, 'Oh, I just want the attention. I feel so good that everybody's listening to me and I got the approval that I need.' "

" Hosting is a thankless job. "

" Mucinex were like, 'Would you like to be the Mucinex man? You sound like you're sick right now'. In each spot, they give me a little bit of room to do something strange. And in a world of fractured mediums, where there is no zeitgeist, and you get your comedy from your phone, it's all content. "

T. J. Miller

Phone

Man

" You just put yourself into your work, and you can do anything you want, depending on how hard you want to work for it. "

" It is good to connect to someone who reminds you that you have some real authenticity. "

" Some people in Silicon Valley are as bad as the 'Koch Brothers', you know? Don't be mistaken. For every some of those, though, you get people who come up with something like 'Leafly', which does what 'Yelp' has done, but in a much more specific way, and it's important because it's the dawn of this new era. "

" Slowly but surely, I went through different phases of fame, and each rises you further into isolation and alienation. "

" It's always fun to agree to be in a movie when you have no idea what it's actually going to be! "

" Mike Judge is my Jonathan Swift, and I say that because I don't know any other satirists. But the problem with satire is that it's so easily misinterpreted. "

" Always remember: My general theme is 'There is no message.' There never has been. Stop trying to find the message or the meaning in everything. That's. My. Theme. "

" I acted in high school and studied at the British American Drama Academy in Oxford for one summer. I minored in theater, and I was always acting growing up and stuff, but really, I was just more interested in the comedy of it all. So for me, it's always comedy, and then acting is just one medium of comedy. "

T. J. Miller

American

Summer

" I would say that awards are for children. Because children need a tangible representation of their achievement. And as adults, you have to settle for the respect and admiration of your peers. "

" I consider myself a fairly ethical individual while I do have a lot of dichotomies within me. We're all victims of our own hypocrisy at times. "

T. J. Miller

Own

Myself

" If you're a psychologist, you can instrumentally change peoples lives for the better. But you can only do that for about 300 people to maybe a thousand people - if you're really prolific and you're working really hard. "

" My father always said I have a face for radio, and 'Cloverfield' was one of my finest pieces of work. "

" I think it is very important to be a method actor. "

" I wouldn't want to be Superman. Batman would be cool. But the one I've always wanted to play is the Joker. There is a maniacal and dangerous side to me. "

T. J. Miller

Cool

Dangerous

" J. P. Morgan. He was kind of a douche. "

T. J. Miller

Kind

Morgan

" I sound like a chain-smoking drag queen after a hard night of singing 'Tie a Yellow Ribbon'. "

" My father really told me, seriously, if you want something, you can have it, but you may have to work harder than anyone else around you. "

" I try to be an ethical, moral person and a nice person, and I like to have that reflected in my comedy. I'm not a mean comedian, and I don't think that my comedy is mean. I think that for the most part, it's more focused on the diversity that we all handle and try to provide a distraction from the disaster of modern living. "

" There's sketch, improv, writing, acting, music, and badminton. Those are the seven forms of comedy. But I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff. "

" I love mispronunciations. I love when people mispronounce things. "

" I always like to have a buffer between me and journalism in general. Not just a reporter, but journalism. "

T. J. Miller

Always