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" My father really told me, seriously, if you want something, you can have it, but you may have to work harder than anyone else around you. "

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" To be honest, I would never have imagined myself acting on a sitcom that I didn't write. "

" Hosting is a thankless job. "

" By the very nature of satire or parody, you have to love and respect your target and respect it enough to understand every aspect of it, so you can more effectively make fun of it. "

" I'm a stand-up. I'm never worried about getting my next role. That's never distressing to me. "

" I don't prepare for anything very well. I am not a good actor. I don't read scripts. "

" I love writing but not crazy meticulous/prepared enough to be a director. I'd work as a gaffer on something. "

" Most things I get hired on, I get hired because I improvise something funny, or they just think I look weird. "

" It is good to connect to someone who reminds you that you have some real authenticity. "

" Stuff that I write isn't as similar to the stuff that I'm in, but I don't really care. I just do comedy. "

" Mike Judge is my Jonathan Swift, and I say that because I don't know any other satirists. But the problem with satire is that it's so easily misinterpreted. "

" I acted in high school and studied at the British American Drama Academy in Oxford for one summer. I minored in theater, and I was always acting growing up and stuff, but really, I was just more interested in the comedy of it all. So for me, it's always comedy, and then acting is just one medium of comedy. "

" Mucinex were like, 'Would you like to be the Mucinex man? You sound like you're sick right now'. In each spot, they give me a little bit of room to do something strange. And in a world of fractured mediums, where there is no zeitgeist, and you get your comedy from your phone, it's all content. "

" I think it is very important to be a method actor. "

" I don't know how much the economy has changed since Jonathan Swift's 'A Modest Proposal.' "

" There's sketch, improv, writing, acting, music, and badminton. Those are the seven forms of comedy. But I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff. "

" I drink a fair amount of ramen noodles. "

" I think I'm just a comedian who's a pretty good con man, and I don't see that changing any time soon. "

" I love mispronunciations. I love when people mispronounce things. "

" I actually prefer Twitter as a medium, and I also got into Periscope for a second, but I'm still trying to figure out what to do with it. I can't figure out if the only important thing about it is the live broadcast, or if it's an interesting kind of way to log what you do. "

" I love Denver. "

" It's always fun to agree to be in a movie when you have no idea what it's actually going to be! "

" When you get into a car, and there's trash, or it's dirty, or one of the hubcaps is off, you're like, 'Come on, dude.' Every woman likes the confidence and self-respect that says, 'I get oil changes. I look after my vehicle.' That's what I recommend: Act like you don't care, but take care of your body. "

" There is no place for a person like me in a world that only takes itself seriously. Satire is so necessary but fairly ineffective. "

" Always remember: My general theme is 'There is no message.' There never has been. Stop trying to find the message or the meaning in everything. That's. My. Theme. "

" I would say that awards are for children. Because children need a tangible representation of their achievement. And as adults, you have to settle for the respect and admiration of your peers. "

" You just put yourself into your work, and you can do anything you want, depending on how hard you want to work for it. "

" I laugh at absurdity hardest, then stories, then observations, then bearded men on roller skates. "

" I feel a strong affinity to Ke$ha and Katy Perry and a lot of these women who are really pushing the girl power femme fatale thing. It's fun, and it's unapologetic, and they tell women they can do whatever they want, and that's true, and that's a message that I want to carry, to tell girls they can do whatever they want. "

" Funny is as funny does, and funny puts on a walrus mask and slowly gyrates in a mall food court. I laugh at absurdity hardest, then stories, then observations, then bearded men on roller skates. "

" My father always said I have a face for radio, and 'Cloverfield' was one of my finest pieces of work. "