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" I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club. "
Elayne Boosler
Much
Than
Theater
Related Quotes:
" I've never been able to write for stand-up. "
Elayne Boosler
Never
Been
Able
" Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix? "
Elayne Boosler
Food
Eight
Party
" When I was growing up in comedy, there were maybe 10 comics in the whole country. Everyone had a day job. You worked free for years in little clubs, then you got your big break and became a star. "
Elayne Boosler
Day
You
Comedy
" A study last year showed that the page you turn to first in the newspaper can be a predictor of how long you will live. No surprise, turning first to the Comics Pages prolongs your life. "
Elayne Boosler
Life
Page
Long
" I personally cannot tell you how many times we rescuers put our names on animals to come to us as soon as they are eligible for release, only to find they have been senselessly killed by overzealous pound workers. "
Elayne Boosler
Find
Us
You
" My breakup with AT&T is final, and I'm done with Skype as the rebound guy. "
Elayne Boosler
Done
Final
Guy
" My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask for directions. "
Elayne Boosler
Men
Wilderness
Ancestors
" I run everywhere and eavesdrop. It's the best way to see a city. "
Elayne Boosler
Best
Best Way
See
" Sometimes, if you really don't know how you feel about a topic, reading how both sides argue it can help. "
Elayne Boosler
You
Sides
Reading
" To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy. "
Elayne Boosler
Listen
Your
Silence
" I have always put my own money into Tails of Joy. For years, every time a dog walked by, my husband would say, 'There goes our beach house.' "
Elayne Boosler
Dog
Time
Money
" I have no complaints about losing money I put in high-risk investments. I did some of that when I had real money; my informed choice, my measured gamble. "
Elayne Boosler
Choice
Losing
Money
" I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. "
Elayne Boosler
Think
People
Funny
" There are many comedians who are afraid to work outside the coasts and the casinos because they're afraid they'll bomb. "
Elayne Boosler
Afraid
Comedians
Outside
" I love being down at Occupy Wall Street. The sincerity, the youth involvement, the desire for better, is palpable and moving. There is true caring, sharing, and refreshingly naive hope. "
Elayne Boosler
Hope
Love
Moving
" My family was totally non-religious. There was no question we were Jewish, but we were not observant. "
Elayne Boosler
Observant
Question
Family
" I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body. "
Elayne Boosler
Person
Trapped
Body
" My belief is that guns are too easy to get in America. My belief is that the NRA has bought much of our congress, to the point that guns are actually the only unregulated consumer product in America. Think about that. It's stunning. "
Elayne Boosler
Belief
Congress
America
" I just get the feeling that if Jesse Helms was in charge of art in America, you'd go into a museum and see nothing but prints of dogs playing cards. "
Elayne Boosler
America
You
Art
" I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. "
Elayne Boosler
Matter
Three
Door
" Incredibly, almost every hotel I ever played in Vegas was blown up shortly afterward: The Dunes, The Sands, The Landmark, The Aladdin, The Frontier, The Hacienda, The Stardust - all were imploded. "
Elayne Boosler
Frontier
Ever
Almost
" I can't get married. I can't fake sleep for 30 years. "
Elayne Boosler
Get Married
Fake
Sleep
" Wouldn't it be great if you could only get AIDS by giving money to television preachers? "
Elayne Boosler
Money
Great
Giving
" We've seen the uproars around the world concerning cartoons depicting the prophet Mohammad. Anyone who does not think comic strips are relevant never had a fatwa put on him/her for drawing a picture. "
Elayne Boosler
Drawing
Never
Picture
" I guess in general, people tend to not eat the cute animals. "
Elayne Boosler
People
Animals
Cute
" Turkeys know their names, come when you call, and are totally affectionate. They're better than teenagers. "
Elayne Boosler
You
Know
Better
" For me, comedy is a day-to-day report on the human condition. It's what's happening right now. I get maybe 20 minutes of my act straight from the newspaper. "
Elayne Boosler
Human
Me
Newspaper
" The message of great art is to disturb. "
Elayne Boosler
Great
Great Art
Art
" We have wild animals in zoos, yet people rarely meet their 'food' face to face. "
Elayne Boosler
Animals
Face
Wild
" As a standup comedian, I've worked almost every New Year's Eve of my adult life. It's the best-paying night of the year. "
Elayne Boosler
Night
Year
Almost