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" If I gamble, I'll play roulette. My wife and I will play roulette, and that's about it. I'm not a heavy gambler. "

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" I have a pretty diverse audience, and that makes me happy - laughter is universal, and I don't differentiate between people at all. Why should I? People are people. There's no reason why one person can't relate to any other person on this planet in some way or another. "

" I'm a human being. I feel all emotions. I'm not just happy all the time. Sometimes, I'm sad and feel the blues. Sometimes I even want to feel the blues. Sometimes, you want to feel down. "

" I have my Lucky Charms in the morning, and I feel magical. "

" I don't even read the newspaper; I don't read that crap. "

" There aren't a lot of guys out there keeping it real. Everybody's been branded. Everybody's been bought and sold. "

" Who's coming with me? I don't know where I'm going, but who's coming with me? "

" I'm glad I dropped out of high school, man. I wouldn't be where I'm at. I would have had a net. I'm glad I didn't have anything to fall back on, man, because that made me go for my dreams that much harder. "

" There's nothing wrong with looking at a woman's kneecaps. "

" Martin Lawrence is one of my comedic heroes, and he's a genius. "

" I'm not perfect, but I strive for it. "

" In New York, we get down. In L.A., everybody's pretty much standing around like they're at a keg stand. You got to get the party started, so I just take my shirt off. "

" It gets scary when you're dealing with people who don't know how to separate fact from fiction. "

" Comedians are the monkeys of acting. When you go to the zoo, everybody loves the monkey exhibit. "

" Most people don't know what's happening around them because they're just speeding through life. And before they know it, they're just old. So I just try to slow it down. "

" If there's one thing I've learned in my life, it's that curiosity might kill cats, but it doesn't kill people. "

" If she's not spoken for, and you come at her correctly, like a man, she'll get with you. "

" As a child, I was able to know that I wanted a better life. "

" You have to give a wound time to heal and think of other people's feelings. "

" It's like going to the zoo when you come to my house. I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. "

" I think the word 'pregnant' is funny. "

" I want to show the world my humor. "

" You will be surprised but I do a lot of studying and I watch National Geographic. "

" To me, politics is a pile of tricks. "

" And when I was angry, when I was younger, I was in a cocoon. Now I'm a beautiful, black butterfly. "

" I do my best creating on stage. "

" My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality. "

" I love my mother. My mother made sure, her stubbornness - she made sure we was going to eat. She made sure we had Christmases. That was my mother. My father wasn't there for that. "

" If we all had a little bit of Michael Jackson in us, I think it would make the world a better place. "

" People walked out on Richard Pryor and he's the funniest man alive. "