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" Miss Britney Spears took a dude that was already with a girl that had babies. And sometimes when you do that kind of stuff and take a dude, that's called karma. "

Loni Love

Take

Kind

Girl

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" Seriously, I love my gays. They accept me, and I accept them. Imperfections and all, we accept each other. "

Loni Love

Love

" I'm what you call a satisfied single. I don't want to give any trip reports when I come home. "

" The late, great Joan Rivers actually gave me so much advice, and she was so nice to me before she passed. "

" That's the one thing I have to say to females. If you don't have a certain look, or if you look a certain way, they won't accept you. "

Loni Love

One Thing

Say

" I've been studying myself because I always want to improve. "

" They're smart in Orange County. Smart and rich - just how I like 'em. "

" I used to be an engineer, and I was the worst engineer in the United States of America. That's why I became a comic. "

" I've seen Don Rickles up at the Montreal Comedy Festival. Don Rickles was doing jokes in a wheelchair, and he was headlining a show. Do you think they would let a woman do that? "

" Being a female comic and getting a Comedy Central special is an honor because not a lot of women get that. "

" I made the conscious decision to not have kids, and I didn't want to be married. "

" I keep doing stand-up because the world needs laughter - there's always something happening in the country and in the world. That's why I wanted to become an entertainer: to help people forget about their problems for a little while. "

" That's a nice thing about being a topical standup: you can add in things to keep it fresh. "

" There is nothing like a live performance. You can look at things on television, and you can look at things on YouTube, but when you get in a room full of people and you say one joke, and everyone's laughing at the same thing, it's a really great experience. "

" I don't want to get married - I've been there and done that. So I know what I'm talking about when I say that. And for everybody has a different path - find out your path! And if you want to do it, don't let people make you feel inadequate because you wanted to do something that's different. "

" It's always good to laugh. "

" The president of CBS handpicked me for the 'Star Search' revival, which Arsenio Hall hosted. He picked 12 comics, and I was the only female. I always look to that as inspiration. "

Loni Love

Look

Inspiration

" People say they get a warmness from me. "

" I was a latchkey kid, so when I saw the 'Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous,' that showed me that there was a different type of lifestyle out there. I was curious about it and amazed about it. "

" I am a seasoned performer. "

Loni Love

I Am

Seasoned

" Being in the Girl Scouts took me out of the projects environment and showed me different things. "

" You men make up these rules, and now you get mad because I'm telling you what a real woman wants. She wants you to treat her like a lady if you want her to sit up there and put on all the lingerie! "

" I love being a regular on 'Chelsea Lately!' "

" Anyone driving a 1992 Cutlass, take it back, because I built it. "

" When we heard that little dial-up sound, that eeeeee, and then you connected, and you then go and you check your mail and you get that 'you got mail,' you were excited. I mean, that was the thing. "

Loni Love

Mean

Connected

" Now that I live in Los Angeles, if I meet somebody from Detroit, it's like there's this brother- or sisterhood, where we're real folks. "

" I do think the audiences have a right to judge what they feel is offensive and not. "

" I tend to be everybody's best friend, and it kind of goes over into my comedy. "

" The thing is, it's that Detroiters are hard workers. We've always been hard workers, even when times are down. I've been able to take that with me, that work ethic, to help me build my career. "

Loni Love

Work

Work Ethic

" Life is funny, and that's why I celebrate it in my shows. "

" I'll see something, and I'll go, 'Oh, wow, that's interesting,' because really, comedy comes from the truth. "

Loni Love

Truth

Comedy