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" There is no place for a person like me in a world that only takes itself seriously. Satire is so necessary but fairly ineffective. "

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" I don't know that I would host the Golden Globes or the Emmys because I don't think they have the appreciation for irreverence that the Critics Choice does. "

" Mucinex were like, 'Would you like to be the Mucinex man? You sound like you're sick right now'. In each spot, they give me a little bit of room to do something strange. And in a world of fractured mediums, where there is no zeitgeist, and you get your comedy from your phone, it's all content. "

" I know about the tech industry in that I follow what apps are hot and software development. I know my way around different browsers. I know how to restart a computer. "

" 'Yogi Bear' changed my life in ways that I can't explain because it's not a full feature on me. 'Yogi Bear' - there's everything before 'Yogi Bear,' and there's everything after 'Yogi Bear.' Like a major car accident, or the birth of Christ. "

" I don't sit and write stand-up material; I come up with an idea onstage. "

" I consider myself a fairly ethical individual while I do have a lot of dichotomies within me. We're all victims of our own hypocrisy at times. "

" Every time I could possibly be doing stand up, I am. "

" I like hip-hop, but I don't like concerts. There's, like, sweat on people's backs. "

" Always remember: My general theme is 'There is no message.' There never has been. Stop trying to find the message or the meaning in everything. That's. My. Theme. "

" I feel like I've forcefully been thrust into the tech world, and I've enjoyed every minute of it. "

" We're not a nation divided: we're a nation broken, and anything broken can be fixed. "

" It's always fun to agree to be in a movie when you have no idea what it's actually going to be! "

" I told the Mucinex people, 'You picked me because I always sound sick'. They were like, 'Well, it doesn't hurt'. "

" I love Denver. "

" I do comedy to give people an ephemeral escape from the tragedy that permeates everyday life. "

" I think I'm just a comedian who's a pretty good con man, and I don't see that changing any time soon. "

" Mike Judge is my Jonathan Swift, and I say that because I don't know any other satirists. But the problem with satire is that it's so easily misinterpreted. "

" I actually prefer Twitter as a medium, and I also got into Periscope for a second, but I'm still trying to figure out what to do with it. I can't figure out if the only important thing about it is the live broadcast, or if it's an interesting kind of way to log what you do. "

" To become the best comedian, I must be well-rounded. "

" I think it is very important to be a method actor. "

" Some people in Silicon Valley are as bad as the 'Koch Brothers', you know? Don't be mistaken. For every some of those, though, you get people who come up with something like 'Leafly', which does what 'Yelp' has done, but in a much more specific way, and it's important because it's the dawn of this new era. "

" I don't prepare for anything very well. I am not a good actor. I don't read scripts. "

" I'm a stand-up. I'm never worried about getting my next role. That's never distressing to me. "

" I feel a strong affinity to Ke$ha and Katy Perry and a lot of these women who are really pushing the girl power femme fatale thing. It's fun, and it's unapologetic, and they tell women they can do whatever they want, and that's true, and that's a message that I want to carry, to tell girls they can do whatever they want. "

" There's nothing I would love more than to host an awards show where I'm nominated for an award - that is so funny to me. "

" To be honest, I would never have imagined myself acting on a sitcom that I didn't write. "

" J. P. Morgan. He was kind of a douche. "

" When you get into a car, and there's trash, or it's dirty, or one of the hubcaps is off, you're like, 'Come on, dude.' Every woman likes the confidence and self-respect that says, 'I get oil changes. I look after my vehicle.' That's what I recommend: Act like you don't care, but take care of your body. "

" We try and reflect that there's a lot of optimism, there's a lot of positive things that are happening in 'Silicon Valley'. "

" It's okay to take yourself too seriously if you're a serious actor and you've got the scrubs on. And then with me, it's kind of like, well, I'm a comedian, I'm making fun of everybody and everything. And I'm making fun of myself. I'm having fun making fun of and for other people. "