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" I've made so many people angry that they kind of blur into one unpleasant memory of people staring at you with somewhere between passive aggression and active aggression. "
John Oliver
Kind
Angry
You
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" My first 'Daily Show' piece was pretending I had this terrible immigrant journey, so I went to talk to an immigration lawyer who would help out people, and I ran into him in Penn Station about three months after I'd gotten the green card. I said, 'I got my green card yesterday.' And he hugged me because he understood that level of relief. "
John Oliver
People
Green
Daily
" People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character. "
John Oliver
Character
Kind
See
" I would never heckle someone. That's why I think I'm so interested in someone that would. "
John Oliver
Interested
Never
Someone
" The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked. "
John Oliver
Quality
Moment
Accept
" There is so much cross-pollination between the U.S. and Britain in terms of comedians. British TV comedies work well in the U.S. American stand-ups make it big in Britain. "
John Oliver
Comedians
American
Well
" I would much rather America was a more stable, wonderful place. You know, I love it. "
John Oliver
Place
More
America
" You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job. "
John Oliver
Point
Day
Hard
" People are always going to say stupid things, and you're always going to be able to make jokes about that, but it should be the last thing you add in, because it's the easiest thing. "
John Oliver
You
Always
Say
" I have occasionally - if ever I do interviews that are difficult or nerve-wracking - I take my wife's dog tags and have them in my pocket because it's a very quick way to realize that what I'm doing is not that important. It's not really worth getting stressed about because it's not, you know, war. "
John Oliver
Know
You
Wife
" There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. "
John Oliver
Hope
New Yorkers
Positive
" I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people. "
John Oliver
Deep
Think
Long
" I did sketch comedy, but I never did improv. So I've just tried to learn as I go. "
John Oliver
Go
Just
Sketch
" Attending a Sarah Palin rally was simultaneously one of the strangest and most chilling events of my life. "
John Oliver
Life
Most
My Life
" Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England, it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing. "
John Oliver
Think
America
Doing
" I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior. "
John Oliver
Think
Human Behavior
Human
" Campaign ads are the backbone of American democracy if American democracy suffered a gigantic spinal injury. "
John Oliver
Campaign
Injury
American
" Politics has become infused with narcissism in America. "
John Oliver
Become
America
Narcissism
" People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on 'The Daily Show'... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor. "
John Oliver
Mistake
People
Daily
" I've said yes to everything that Jon Stewart has asked me to do. That's been a pretty good career decision, I think. "
John Oliver
Said
Me
Decision
" Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels. "
John Oliver
Person
British
Down
" When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing. "
John Oliver
Serious
You
Know
" I'm British, so obviously I repress any powerful emotions of any kind in relation to anything. "
John Oliver
Anything
Powerful
Kind
" Southern people are bigger-hearted and kinder than I had any right to expect. "
John Oliver
Right
Than
Expect
" I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I thought I could do an American accent until I tried it in front of an American - the expression of horror is still burnt onto my retinas. "
John Oliver
American
I Can
Horror
" There is no greater anesthetic than sport. "
John Oliver
Greater
Sport
Anesthetic
" Politicians don't really bring up religion in England. "
John Oliver
Bring
Politicians
Up
" Having a human conversation is not something I've had any training in either as a comedian or as, you know, a human being. "
John Oliver
Conversation
Know
Training
" I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life. "
John Oliver
Life
Take
Soul
" I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in! "
John Oliver
More
Pressure
Trying
" Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back. "
John Oliver
You
Someone
Back