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" Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. "
Mark Twain
Other
People
Nothing
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" All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure. "
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" In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours. "
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" The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause. "
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" Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. "
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" I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened. "
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" I never let schooling interfere with my education. "
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" Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. "
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" The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice. "
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" The Public is merely a multiplied 'me.' "
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" Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. "
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" Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.' "
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" What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce. "
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" Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel. "
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" The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right. "
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" The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. "
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" Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very'; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be. "
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Writing
" Why shouldn't truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. "
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Why
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" The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter - 'tis the difference between the lightning-bug and the lightning. "
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" Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't. "
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" Let us endeavor so to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry. "
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" Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it. "
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Forgiveness
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" We Americans... bear the ark of liberties of the world. "
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" Humor is mankind's greatest blessing. "
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" Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. "
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" I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one. "
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" Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all. "
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Than
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