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" Humor is mankind's greatest blessing. "
Mark Twain
Greatest
Blessing
Humor
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" Laughter is the closest distance between two people. "
Victor Borge
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" The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop. "
Mark Twain
Interesting
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Children
" I don't think it's possible to have a sense of tragedy without having a sense of humor. "
Christopher Hitchens
" Repartee is something we think of twenty-four hours too late. "
Mark Twain
Hours
Late
Something
" In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours. "
Mark Twain
Inside
Hours
Nature
" The first ingredient in conversation is truth, the next good sense, the third good humor, and the fourth wit. "
William Temple
Humor
Conversation
Good
" If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. "
Mark Twain
Tell
You
Truth
" I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. "
Mark Twain
Damn
Word
Man
" Better a broken promise than none at all. "
Mark Twain
Broken
Than
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" There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. "
Mark Twain
Charm
Makes
About
" A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. "
Mark Twain
Own
Approval
Without
" Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work. "
Mark Twain
Thunder
Good
Work
" All right, then, I'll go to hell. "
Mark Twain
Then
Right
Go
" A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road. "
Henry Ward Beecher
Sense Of Humor
Road
Humor
" India has 2,000,000 gods and worships them all. In religion, all other countries are paupers; India is the only millionaire. "
Mark Twain
Millionaire
Gods
India
" Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. "
Mark Twain
Age
Been
Smiles
" I love Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart because they're bringing irony back into American humor, which is a delicious treat. The entire Colbert persona of being extreme right-wing when he's not at all is highly amusing. He does it so well, but sometimes a little too well. My wife is convinced he's completely that way. "
John Lydon
Wife
Back
Humor
" When people are in the midst of really heavy stuff and still have a sense of humor, I admire that. "
Ted Danson
People
Sense Of Humor
Admire
" As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake. "
Mark Twain
Myself
Moderation
Smoking
" Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand. "
Mark Twain
Nothing
Against
Laughter
" Sometimes I used to think to myself, 'Have I lost a sense of humor?' but I don't think that I have. I think one can be as snarky and sarcastic as lots of people, but I have never found that it makes me particularly happy. "
Kenneth Branagh
Myself
Think
Me
" Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat. "
Mark Twain
Pity
Party
Boat
" All my humor is based on destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence, I'd be standing in the bread line - right in back of J. Edgar Hoover. "
Lenny Bruce
Back
Bread
Humor
" The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. "
Mark Twain
Man
Die
Time
" Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. "
Mark Twain
Other
People
Nothing
" I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry often and easily. I think you're supposed to feel all kinds of things. "
Ellen DeGeneres
Humor
I Am
Sad
" Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever. "
Mark Twain
Live
Preach
Teach
" Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to. "
Mark Twain
Animal
Needs
Only
" We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor. "
Bobby Clarke
Route
Puck
Ill
" A good-humored wife who appreciates most, if not all, of my humor - her price is far above rubies, as the book of Proverbs doesn't quite say. "
Andrew Hudgins
Her
Book
Say