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" Anyone who bombs is my friend. "

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" I had temping jobs also. I liked the flexibility. There was no asking for time off; you just didn't work. "

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" There's people that are just in awe of what you do, and then there are people who just think it's garbage. And I think there are people who are just uncomfortable seeing someone have fun with their job. "

" I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that. "

" I loved Australia. I was very successful there. "

" I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage. "

" I mean, I guess I started during the comedy boom, so it was literally like, on Sunday you could decide you wanted to be a comic, and on Monday, you could be on stage. "

" People don't understand that that's really what it is. They're looking for a magic phone number or something. And to a certain extent, I understand that, because comedy is treated so much as a stepping stone by a lot of people. "

" There seems to be more comedy for comedy's sake. "

" And the goal really is to make the audience laugh, to bring them some joy. "

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" Well, I have since seen you at Tinkle. It's a comedy show started by David Cross, me and Jon Benjamin. It features a wide variety of acts for all tastes and seasons. "

" My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act. "

" If you see me at a restaurant, blow me a kiss, wave, blow me another kiss, then walk five steps backward. "

" I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable. "

" I don't feel I'm even worthy of a normal amount of value. "

" I will not be misquoted! "

" I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate. "

" I'm traveling the world, ripping rooms apart with my stupendous comedy. "

" Only lately, like within the last few years, have I had people actually do an impression of me to me, which weirds me out to think of what they have picked up on, without ever realizing it myself. "

" I would call it a comedy variety show. We have some people just doing straight standup. We usually try to have one musical act of sort. So its just people being funny in different ways, not just sketch, not just standup, not just characters, all of those things. "

" I want to release another CD this year, finish writing a screenplay, and make another short film. "

" I do not like sports, unless you consider treating all humankind with love and respect a sport. "

" I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started. "

" I'm particularly proud of my reluctance to share my dreams with anyone. "

" Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days. "

" I am the the type to have a personal experience with a celebrity, but I'm too classy to bring that up. "

" I liked the koala, wallaby, and I chilled with a kangaroo a bit. There was a wombat that I quite enjoyed also. "

" It was actually 3 years between albums. That seems like a long time to me. "