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" If you think about how many headlining female comics are out there, you could say 15, maybe 20? "

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" Even when I was an engineer, I was a comic on my job. At birthday and holiday parties, I was the one scheduling and emceeing. If you work on your gift, and you're good, it will shine through. "

" Whatever you're destined to do, you will be. "

" We provide comedy for everybody, no matter what your race or gender. We just want people to come out and have a really good time. "

" We have to remember that people are free to love who they want to love. That also means that black women are free to love who they want to love. "

" People say they get a warmness from me. "

" I like having peace and quiet in my life, and I am perfectly happy in my relationships. "

" I love being a regular on 'Chelsea Lately!' "

" They're smart in Orange County. Smart and rich - just how I like 'em. "

" I made the conscious decision to not have kids, and I didn't want to be married. "

" That's a nice thing about being a topical standup: you can add in things to keep it fresh. "

" Being a former engineer, you learn to always go back, study yourself, see what you could've done differently, see what you could've said. "

" I couldn't be where I am today if I had children. My focus would be on my children and home. And you can do it later in life. "

" Seriously, I love my gays. They accept me, and I accept them. Imperfections and all, we accept each other. "

" Life is funny, and that's why I celebrate it in my shows. "

" The thing is being honest with yourself. There's no rule that says you have to be married and have kids. "

" The president of CBS handpicked me for the 'Star Search' revival, which Arsenio Hall hosted. He picked 12 comics, and I was the only female. I always look to that as inspiration. "

" When you're a plus-sized girl, belts are your best friends. I also love bright colors and skirts, to show my pretty knees. "

" Being a female comic and getting a Comedy Central special is an honor because not a lot of women get that. "

" I always tell people if you want to do something, go to a great comedy show. And that's what I try to do: give people a really good comedy show. "

" I started by doing a little funny story, and then I started going to open mics. I realized I had a lot of work to do - you have to get over the stage fright and get your stage presence up. It took me some time, but I finally feel that I'm at a point where I feel comfortable on stage and giving my point of view. "

" Now AOL is the grandma of online Web services. I mean, we don't need it anymore. "

" It is harder to dress a bigger woman no matter what anybody wants to say. "

" I do talk about celebrity relationships like Kim Kardashian's. I like to find the humor in love. "

" People are getting picked up off the street and getting a show, and it's because we're not using the people that are trying to be entertainers - use more of them. "

" What we're trying to do is take these words and soften them. I'm an African-American comic. I use the b-word in my act. "

African-American

" I will never say never, but I can tell you right now - I am perfectly happy with being who I am. I just - I really - I'm an entertainer, and the thing that I'd decided to work on was my career, and I decided the energy that I was putting in certain relationships - I was really kind of wasting my time, and I knew it. "

" I tend to be everybody's best friend, and it kind of goes over into my comedy. "

" It's always good to laugh. "

" I was a latchkey kid, so when I saw the 'Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous,' that showed me that there was a different type of lifestyle out there. I was curious about it and amazed about it. "

" I don't want to get married - I've been there and done that. So I know what I'm talking about when I say that. And for everybody has a different path - find out your path! And if you want to do it, don't let people make you feel inadequate because you wanted to do something that's different. "