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" The mistake that people make in stand-up is thinking they're profound or they're deep when there are so many people who have more worthwhile ways of phrasing things. "
Colin Quinn
Thinking
People
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" I think people tend to feel odd when I do my act. Unless you are an ironic person, it's not a good place for you to be. "
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" For the most part, comedians are pretty friendly with each other. They always say they badmouth each other, but most of the time, they're friends. We're the only ones that can really stand our type of humor. "
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Friends
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" My stand-up act? I combine the fact that the world is a violent place with the fact that each person is responsible for the situation they are in. "
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Place
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" The only people who like to live alone more than comics are priests. "
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" I've been to Japan, I've been to China, I've been to Africa, I've been to the Middle East, I've been to Europe a little bit. I've never been to South America. "
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America
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China
" I would say most comedians have a very cynical worldview of the way the world can work. It's almost like if you didn't, you couldn't be a comedian. "
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World
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" I feel most empires fell when they started to act human, but then look at Russia. They kept a pretty strong hand, and they fell from Afghanistan alone because Afghanistan is the graveyard of empires. I guess you just can't sustain it. "
Colin Quinn
Look
Feel
Empires
" Everybody's got a different sense of humor. It's just different styles. "
Colin Quinn
Sense
Sense Of Humor
Different
" Everybody's funny in different ways. "
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Ways
Different
Everybody
" I love people, I love studying people more than history. So whatever situation I see, then I look at, what were the people like, more than history itself. "
Colin Quinn
History
Situation
People
" If I had to give up everything else and keep just one aspect of the job, I'd have to keep writing because I love it. Yes, I enjoy performing, too. But I couldn't give up writing material. "
Colin Quinn
Job
Enjoy
Because
" I think Helen of Troy must have been pretty hot. She got two countries going crazy for 10 years over her. "
Colin Quinn
Crazy
Two
Think
" People's - most people's job is talking about the future or like money not even in the present tense. It's not even paper. "
Colin Quinn
Money
Present
People
" I think I identify more with the smart guy, but most people might take umbrage at that. I like to think of myself as a real thinker, but I suppose people might beg to differ. "
Colin Quinn
Myself
Think
Real
" You know, the funny thing about Lorne and that show is that, you can go over one million things, but in a business of bean counters, he still likes to laugh at small things and creates a show around it. "
Colin Quinn
Funny
Small
Small Things
" I think if you try to tailor your act to anybody, you end up with an act that doesn't work anyway. "
Colin Quinn
Think
Work
You
" You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything. "
Colin Quinn
Good
Funny
Writing
" Stand-up is live, so I'm used to being live for most of my career. It's interesting. "
Colin Quinn
Most
Career
Interesting
" I'm always working on stuff. But they never materialize. I'm always working on movies and TV shows. "
Colin Quinn
Working
Movies
Stuff
" I think everyone should own six guns, even though I don't own any. "
Colin Quinn
Though
Think
Even
" With comedians, you have that understanding that we're trying to get laughs. "
Colin Quinn
Understanding
You
Comedians
" He is very dry but also very funny... I think people tend to feel odd when I do my act. Unless you are an ironic person, it's not a good place for you to be. "
Colin Quinn
Good
People
Place
" My name has zero value. "
Colin Quinn
Name
Value
Zero
" I was a class clown. "
Colin Quinn
Class Clown
Clown
Class
" I write all the time - I write poetry, I love to write. "
Colin Quinn
I Love
Poetry
Love
" I like guy stuff. "
Colin Quinn
Stuff
Like
Guy
" When I look back now I realize I was such an obnoxious kid but, you know, I went to schools like you, like a public school in New York so compared to the anarchy that was going on there, they really wouldn't - I wasn't like a bad kid. I saw people come in and punch the teachers. "
Colin Quinn
School
Know
Look
" That's the beauty of being a comedian - it's the one job you're allowed to do that. We're lucky. We're really lucky. "
Colin Quinn
Being
Job
Lucky
" You can't make everybody laugh. You gotta just do what you think is funny. Just be obstreperous to everybody. "
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Just
You
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" Twitter is one of those dangerous toys that if it gets in the hands of the wrong person you'll have the mind of a 12-year-old masquerading as an adult. "
Colin Quinn
Person
Dangerous
Hands