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" To this day, when I say that I went to the American Academy, people are very impressed. The reputation of the school has always been fantastic. "

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" An insult is mean or unkind. Milton Berle called me the Sultan of Insult, and I was called the King of Insult. But the guy that gave me the best title - and I use it to this day - was Johnny Carson. He called me Mr. Warmth. "

" I have my own gym. When you do jokes and they sell, you get a gym. "

" I don't like to compare myself with anybody. "

" Everything I've ever done in my whole career, people might not know, I've never written anything down on paper. "

" Sometimes, I knew generally what I was going to do, but I've never written anything down. Call it a sixth sense: the lines just come. "

" Some people call me a legend and the last of the greats, and I appreciate it. "

" Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap. "

" Now when I'm not working, I don't really hang out with the young comics. "

" The thing I love about Vegas is that it's a melting pot. It's like working Ellis Island. "

" Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed. "

" Bob Newhart, who is my best friend, is one of the guys I adore. "

" My grandchildren just know me now as Mr. Potato Head. "

" Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black. "

" Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder? "

" Johnny Carson was king of the kings, in my opinion. "

" My wife is great. She always goes to the bank to see if the check has cleared. "

" I do situations and make fun of authority and life. "

" I don't drink much anymore, but when I traveled with Frank Sinatra, God rest his soul, I used to drink like I could do it. He made it a test. In Vegas, the Rat Pack, which I was a little part of, drank all night and slept most of the day. Then, about 5 o'clock, we'd meet in the hotel steam room, lock the door, and steam our brains out. "

" In the 45 years I've worked in casinos, I dreamed of being honored by an organization like the American Gaming Association, especially since I don't even have a hunting license. "

" You know how a fighter always comes into the dressing room way before a fight? That's me - I'm like a fighter. "

" I exaggerate all our selves, our beings. I make fun of everything: of our life and what we are. But I don't tell jokes, really. I just exaggerate life, and it comes out funny. "

" I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is. "

" You know what's funny to me? Attitude. "

" I'm not one of those guys who wants to die on a stage. "

" Don't call me 'sir; 'King Jew' will do fine. "

" Everything I've performed has been from my own head. "

" Bob Hope was totally regimented. I go in and say a line like, 'Hi Bob' and I'd have to do it five times, and then Bob would take me to the writers to say the line different ways. He wouldn't let me ad-lib. "

" The girls, like, in we'll say Hooters, have less clothing than the girls I worked with in those days. We thought it was wild when they just wore little bells and so forth. But today, in restaurants, some of the waitresses almost work in the nude, you know, to get business. "

" I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid. "

" I mean, in my - and I'm not trying to do spilled milk, but in those days it was a little - I think it was much tougher, because you got an image, and you were in a saloon. And it was tough to come out of a saloon and to get in films, and to maintain an image, you know. "