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" Well, I don't know how astute I am, but I did want to be a journalist when I was growing up. "

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" Ask anyone who's successful how they got there, you're going to hear a different story. "

" My mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too. "

" I loved doing 'The Family' with Eunice and Mama. They were very interesting because there were no jokes written into those sketches. It was all character-driven. And sometimes it got a little heavy. "

" I never regretted turning down anything, I never regretted losing a job because I always felt something else was out there. "

" Adolescence is just one big walking pimple. "

" Jimmy Stewart and Lucille Ball were so unique. "

" Just scream! You vent, and the body just feels good after a good old yell. "

" When things are a disappointment, try not to be so discouraged. "

" Because of YouTube, I'm getting fan mail from 10-year-olds and teenagers and college kids. "

" I don't watch sitcoms. I really don't. My problem with them is they take so long to film them that there's no spontaneity. I want to see that. "

" When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go. "

" If I go to a party, I'm not one to be the funniest person in the room at all. "

" As far as sitcoms go, I thought Jenna Elfman in 'Dharma and Greg' was a wonderful physical comedienne who had great timing. "

" I struggled for a while, but when I was cast in an Off Broadway show called 'Once Upon a Mattress,' that kind of put me on the map. "

" I have an iPhone, and I can text, and I can use the phone, and I can even take pictures with it. "

" I was once asked to do my Tarzan yell at Bergdorf Goodman, and a guard burst in with a gun! Now I only do it under controlled circumstances. "

" It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington. "

" I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that. "

" When I went to New York to try and make it, I never thought it wouldn't happen. "

" Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing. "

" I was raised going to the movies with my grandmother as a kid. And then I'd come home, and my best friend and I would act out the films that we saw. "

" I very much enjoyed doing 'Law & Order,' playing a killer - that was fun, and they had a family feel around the set, so it was a happy show to do even though the subject matter was quite the opposite. "

" I love Maya Rudolph. She's very multitalented herself. "

" I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes. "

" I'm not always optimistic. You wouldn't have all cylinders cooking if you were always like Mary Poppins. "

" You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself. "

" My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen. "

" My favorite is doing the television show, as a variety show, every week. If the show wasn't that great one week, we could always come back and apologize, you know? "

" Because nobody goes through life without a scar. "

" Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief. "