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" Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independents, by the way. "

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" I've always said money may buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail. "

" If you ain't Texan, I ain't got time for you. "

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" We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians. "

" Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people. "

" I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care. "

" I'll tell you right now. I'm for prayer in school. "

" The only currency I value is the coin of the spirit. That's very important in my life. "

" These days, there are many people around the world who listen to the songs that made me infamous and read the books that made me respectable. "

" I'll keep us out of war with Oklahoma! "

" Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail. "

" We were a country band with a social conscience. "

" A happy childhood... is the worst possible preparation for life. "

" No, nothing has changed in my life at all, and nothing would change if I had millions. "

" Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest. "

" The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror. "

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" Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. "