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All Quotes by author - Karl Pilkington
" All fame is is having people you don't know coming up to you and saying, 'Hello.' I'm always polite and people are always nice, but it's weird. "
Know
Nice
Saying
" And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding. "
Wedding
Reason
Got
" A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect. "
Slug
Own
Always
" At the end of the day, teachers aren't going to mess about trying to make me into an Einstein, 'cause it was never gonna happen. We can't all be brainy, can we? That's just the way the world is. "
End
World
Way
" Being honest with you, it's not the 'great' wall of China. It's an all right wall. It's the 'All Right Wall of China.' "
Wall
China
Great
" But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot. "
Learned
End
Idiot
" Chinese people age overnight. "
Age
Chinese
Overnight
" Comedy's really subjective, you know. "
Comedy
Know
Really
" Comedy's really subjective, you know; that's why it's so hard. "
You
Why
Comedy
" Everyone is living for everyone else now. They're doing stuff so they can tell other people about it. I don't get all that social media stuff, I've always got other things I want to do - odd jobs around the house. No one wants to hear about that. "
Want
Doing
Media
" For me, a good holiday is about value for money rather than things to see. "
Value
See
Money
" Getting old is better than being young. You can do what you want to do. "
Young
Better
Getting Old
" I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling. "
I Am
Looking
Nature
" I came face-to-face with a gorilla which was quite good, but it was a 10-hour trek in bad weather, up hills, covered in mud, with mosquitoes everywhere and when we got there the gorilla's just sat there doing nowt. "
Good
Mud
Got
" I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester. "
Manchester
Any
Know
" I don't know what 'famous' is, really. "
Famous
Know
Really
" I don't know what I'm meant to do. I'm not important, am I? I'm not doing anything that makes a difference. "
Difference
Doing
Am
" I don't know what the future is, but you just do it whilst it's there, don't you? "
Future
You
Know
" I don't really go out at night in terms of noisy, busy places; I prefer more of a quiet corner somewhere. "
Go
Quiet
Busy
" I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest. "
Parent
Good
Good Parent
" I don't want to go about offending people; that's not my plan. "
About
Offending
People
" I don't watch much telly, the telly hardly goes on, but the things I do watch are sort of nature programs, and something about the oceans and the amount of weird fish that's in there. "
Much
Watch
Weird
" I'd rather live in a cave with a view of a palace than live in a palace with a view of a cave. "
Live
View
Than
" I drive a car, like an adult. Not brilliantly. I'm not great. "
Drive
Great
Adult
" I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about. "
Say
House
Best
" I found that being with happy positive people annoys me. "
Happy
Positive
People
" If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared. "
You
Scared
Me
" If you go away with, you know, a girlfriend, wife, whatever, you have an argument on holiday because you're not used to spending that much time with people. "
Holiday
Know
People
" If you're doing the same job every day, there's room for error. "
Same
Doing
Every Day
" If you sit in a bath of pineapple chunks, it can kill you. That's well documented. "
Bath
Documented
Chunks
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