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" A loafer always has the correct time. "
Kin Hubbard
Correct
Always
Time
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" Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble. "
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Trouble
Ever
Grew
" An optimist is a fellow who believes what's going to be will be postponed. "
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Optimist
Fellow
Going
" It used to be that a fellow went on the police force when everything else failed, but today he goes in the advertising game. "
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Game
Used
Today
" Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid. "
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Credit
Some
Only
" Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you. "
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While
Nothing
Irritating
" As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith. "
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Day
Painful
Gold
" It isn't enough for you to love money - it's also necessary that money should love you. "
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Money
Love
Enough
" The world gets better every day - then worse again in the evening. "
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Better
Every Day
World
" If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us. "
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Good Night
Night
Rest
" Bargain... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on. "
Kin Hubbard
Store
Anything
Losing
" If there's anything a public servant hates to do it's something for the public. "
Kin Hubbard
Government
Something
Servant
" I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans. "
Kin Hubbard
Government
Look
Long
" Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home. "
Kin Hubbard
Home
Goes
Long
" The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more. "
Kin Hubbard
You
The Hardest Thing
More
" It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed. "
Kin Hubbard
Tell
Happiness
Poverty
" The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them. "
Kin Hubbard
Entertain
Only
Some
" A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one. "
Kin Hubbard
Almost
Many
Pays
" Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count. "
Kin Hubbard
Got
Optimist
Everything
" Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs. "
Kin Hubbard
Life
More
Insurance
" Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause. "
Kin Hubbard
Kicks
Applause
Being
" If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation. "
Kin Hubbard
You
Vacation
Some People
" The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing. "
Kin Hubbard
Singing
Worst
Mother
" It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about. "
Kin Hubbard
Keep
Know
Plan
" I'll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that's more than I can say for prosperity. "
Kin Hubbard
Adversity
Stand
Say
" Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely. "
Kin Hubbard
Pretty
Being
Above
" Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper. "
Kin Hubbard
Newspaper
Ignorance
Bliss
" All the world loves a good loser. "
Kin Hubbard
Loser
Failure
Good
" Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it. "
Kin Hubbard
His
Hard
Man
" Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny. "
Kin Hubbard
Bad
Management
Destiny
" A bee is never as busy as it seems; it's just that it can't buzz any slower. "
Kin Hubbard
Never
Nature
Just