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" Being an optimist after you've got everything you want doesn't count. "
Kin Hubbard
Got
Optimist
Everything
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" Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you. "
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" It's the good loser who finally loses out. "
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" Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit. "
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" After a fellow gets famous it doesn't take long for someone to bob up that used to sit by him in school. "
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Long
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" Some folks can look so busy doing nothing that they seem indispensable. "
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" Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it's by applause. "
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Applause
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" It isn't enough for you to love money - it's also necessary that money should love you. "
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Love
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" It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth once they inherit it. "
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Going
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Fun
" Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet. "
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Nobody
Where
Forgets
" A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one. "
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Almost
Many
Pays
" If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation. "
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You
Vacation
Some People
" The world gets better every day - then worse again in the evening. "
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Every Day
World
" Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely. "
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Pretty
Being
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" The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. "
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Own
Out
Just
" The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing. "
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Singing
Worst
Mother
" There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them. "
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Either
Nobody
Two
" If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us. "
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Good Night
Night
Rest
" There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose. "
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Weakness
Failure
Own
" There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it? "
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You
Man
Success
" Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature. "
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Now And Then
Man
Innocent
" Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home. "
Kin Hubbard
Home
Goes
Long
" Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people. "
Kin Hubbard
Some People
Honesty
People
" Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest. "
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Nobody
Agreeable
Guest
" No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech. "
Kin Hubbard
Speech
Woman
Alone
" It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed. "
Kin Hubbard
Happiness
Wealth
Tell
" Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. "
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Lot
Men
Will
" Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune. "
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Kind
Turn
Music
" The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them. "
Kin Hubbard
Entertain
Only
Some
" Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper. "
Kin Hubbard
Newspaper
Ignorance
Bliss
" Every once in a while someone without a single bad habit gets caught. "
Kin Hubbard
Without
Bad
Habit