Home
Authors
Tags
App
Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App
" Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should be focused on how to do that in the most fiscally responsible manner possible. "
Lewis Black
People
Country
Help
Related Quotes:
" Janeane Garofalo ended up, in a sense, being pushed by the media into becoming a pundit. "
Lewis Black
Ended
Up
Sense
" The people we elect aren't bipartisan. The American public is bipartisan. "
Lewis Black
American
Bipartisan
Public
" The fine line that you do when you do political comedy is, as long as you have that laugh, you're fine. "
Lewis Black
Comedy
You
Political
" I continue to work on plays, but I've always felt that you could put a note in a bottle and send it offshore, and you'd have as much chance communicating with people. "
Lewis Black
You
Always
Work
" Most of the longer-term relationships I've known have been gay relationships. They seem to be able to hang out longer. "
Lewis Black
Most
Hang
Out
" You don't want another Enron? Here's your law: If a company, can't explain, in one sentence, what it does... it's illegal. "
Lewis Black
Company
You
Want
" I would like to play Pebble Beach at some point. I keep waiting for them to call and ask me to that little pro-am thing, but I'm not big enough. "
Lewis Black
Play
Enough
Beach
" My parents were married for sixty-five years, and I was married for about ten minutes, my first year at Yale Drama School. Something, somehow, didn't get passed on to my generation. "
Lewis Black
Drama
Generation
Parents
" When people come to my act any time after Thanksgiving, I usually say, You shouldn't be here. You should be shopping. Our economy depends on you! You should be out there buying stuff.' "
Lewis Black
Time
Thanksgiving
People
" Anybody who likes writing a book is an idiot. Because it's impossible; it's like having a homework assignment every stinking day until it's done. And by the time you get it in, it's done and you're sitting there reading it, and you realize the 12,000 things you didn't do. I mean, writing isn't fun. It's never been fun. "
Lewis Black
Day
Writing
Reading
" People would be a lot better off if they'd enjoy being single. "
Lewis Black
Single
Enjoy
Better
" I don't buy the 'at 60 it's great to have kids' thing. I don't buy the line that has been thrown down - 'You can have a kid at any time.' That doesn't mean you should. "
Lewis Black
Kid
Great
Down
" Self-love is a big part of golf. "
Lewis Black
Golf
Big
Part
" If we're not going to tax the rich anymore, we're going to create class warfare. "
Lewis Black
Rich
Tax
Going
" I've been very lucky. There are guys I know who are really terrific in this business of stand-up who have not gotten the recognition they deserve. And it's nice, if you've put in the time, to achieve that recognition. "
Lewis Black
Business
Know
Nice
" What you don't do, if you're an adult, is decide that you're going to budget things through a sequester. What does that word have to do with budgeting? It's like if you have a family budget and go, 'We really don't know what to take out economically from the budget, so we're going to whack out protein for this week.' "
Lewis Black
Family
Go
Know
" This is how sad my life is: I got a scar from scratching my chicken pox too much. That's my big scar story. I really have no major scars. "
Lewis Black
Chicken
Life
My Life
" I don't Tweet a lot because I've Tweeted things that I thought were really innocuous about subjects that are inflammatory, and the response is so insane sometimes from people. "
Lewis Black
Sometimes
Thought
People
" When a country wants television more than they want clean water, they've lost their grip. "
Lewis Black
Country
Lost
Water
" My father worked at the Naval Ordnance Lab, and they had a nine-hole course on the property. You paid a quarter. "
Lewis Black
Quarter
Property
Father
" Socialism appeals to me. It's like imposed Christianity. You've got to share. "
Lewis Black
Socialism
Got
Like
" I love anything that gets me outside of my own head. "
Lewis Black
Me
Head
Love
" Stand-up is the only thing in which you actually write it, act it and direct it simultaneously, so it's actually a great theater exercise. "
Lewis Black
Great
You
Only
" Everybody's always asking me about my blood pressure. They did an interview once where they hooked me up to a blood pressure machine and they'd rile me. I'd yell and scream, and then it would just go back to normal in a few minutes. Everything else is probably rotting, but the blood pressure is spectacular. "
Lewis Black
Interview
Me
Pressure
" One of the interesting things about comedy is it's tension release, and nothing creates tension faster than anger. "
Lewis Black
Nothing
Interesting
Comedy
" Political audiences are not fun. "
Lewis Black
Political
Fun
Audiences
" All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911. "
Lewis Black
Funny
Candy
Corn
" The worst thing about Halloween is, of course, candy corn. It's unbelievable to me. Candy corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised. And there's a reason. All of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911. And so, since nobody eats that stuff, every year there's a ton of it left over. "
Lewis Black
America
Me
History
" When we anticipate, we're the happiest. Unless you're on antidepressants. The reason you take antidepressants is because you can't anticipate. You think everything's going to be horrible, so it usually is. "
Lewis Black
You
Everything
Going
" Everybody's family has different values. "
Lewis Black
Everybody
Different
Values