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" Funny is the world I live in. You're funny, I'm interested. You're not funny, I'm not interested. "

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" Pay attention, don't let life go by you. Fall in love with the back of your cereal box. "

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" I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. "

Rodney Dangerfield

" If you play it straight it's funny - the best comedy is always played straight down the middle. The adjustment is understanding from the screenplay that a moment is hilarious. "

" A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. "

George Bernard Shaw

" They're great girls. They're very funny, they're very smart, they're fun to be with. They're very lively, as I think people can tell. And you know, they're very confident girls. "

" A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. "

" I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. "

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" I'm fascinated with the stories that we tell. Real histories become fantasies and fairy tales, morality tales and fables. There's something interesting and funny and perverse about the way fairytale sometimes passes for history, for truth. "

" The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. "

P. G. Wodehouse

" If you believe, as I do believe, in reincarnation, they say that every time you come back, it's because you have to finish something. I've a funny feeling that my thing in this life is to have one relationship after another. "

" I look out at the stadiums full of people and see them all knowing the words to songs I wrote. And curling their hair! I remember straightening my hair because I wanted to be like everybody else, and now the fact that anybody would emulate what I do? It's just funny. And wonderful. "

" I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut. "

Ellen DeGeneres

" Do you know, it's funny, but I never thought of being blind as a disadvantage, and I never thought of being black as a disadvantage. "

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" I've had an experience through music that has touched almost every part of me. It educated me in ways that I didn't get educated in school. So we try to lay on a bit of that, through being funny, being serious, playing hard. "

Bruce Springsteen