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" In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time. "

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" What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds. "

" I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. "

Political Party

" If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress. "

" Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation. "

" It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts. "

" The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they have to live off each other, while the Republicans, why, they live off the Democrats. "

" If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics. "

" I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. "

" If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing. "

" If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them. "

" A fool and his money are soon elected. "

" Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week. "

" Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. "

" You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way. "

" The United States never lost a war or won a conference. "

" Things ain't what they used to be and never were. "

" Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have. "

" Prohibition is better than no liquor at all. "

" An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh. "

" The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them. "

" The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer. "

" Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even. "

" Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. "

" There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in. "

" Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators. "

" There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education. "

" People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide. "

" There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators. "

" People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. "

" Politics is applesauce. "