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" You fall out of your mother's womb, you crawl across open country under fire, and drop into your grave. "
Quentin Crisp
Fire
You
Open
Related Quotes:
" Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave. "
Quentin Crisp
Happened
Grave
Funny
" Abatement in the hostility of one's enemies must never be thought to signify they have been won over. It only means that one has ceased to constitute a threat. "
Quentin Crisp
Over
Never
Won
" Health consists of having the same diseases as one's neighbors. "
Quentin Crisp
Neighbors
Same
Having
" The consuming desire of most human beings is deliberately to plant their whole life in the hands of some other person. I would describe this method of searching for happiness as immature. Development of character consists solely in moving toward self-sufficiency. "
Quentin Crisp
Life
Happiness
Moving
" The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us. "
Quentin Crisp
Opinion
People
Purpose
" Fashion is what you adopt when you don't know who you are. "
Quentin Crisp
Fashion
Adopt
You
" Is not the whole world a vast house of assignation of which the filing system has been lost? "
Quentin Crisp
Lost
World
Whole
" There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse. "
Quentin Crisp
Four
First
Dirt
" Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh. "
Quentin Crisp
Nothing
Misfortunes
Laugh
" It is not the simple statement of facts that ushers in freedom; it is the constant repetition of them that has this liberating effect. Tolerance is the result not of enlightenment, but of boredom. "
Quentin Crisp
Tolerance
Simple
Freedom
" If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style. "
Quentin Crisp
Succeed
Failure
First
" However low a man sinks he never reaches the level of the police. "
Quentin Crisp
Man
Level
He
" The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another. "
Quentin Crisp
Parents
Problem
Young
" For flavor, instant sex will never supersede the stuff you have to peel and cook. "
Quentin Crisp
Sex
You
Will
" Decency must be an even more exhausting state to maintain than its opposite. Those who succeed seem to need a stupefying amount of sleep. "
Quentin Crisp
Sleep
Need
More
" I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds. "
Quentin Crisp
Imagine
Give
Force
" Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level. "
Quentin Crisp
Never
Up
Level
" My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it. "
Quentin Crisp
Mother
Father
Parenting
" When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe? "
Quentin Crisp
Believe
You
God
" The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster. "
Quentin Crisp
Treat
Relationship
Achieving
" The trouble with children is that they're not returnable. "
Quentin Crisp
Trouble
Children
" It is explained that all relationships require a little give and take. This is untrue. Any partnership demands that we give and give and give and at the last, as we flop into our graves exhausted, we are told that we didn't give enough. "
Quentin Crisp
Enough
Last
Relationships
" To know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody. "
Quentin Crisp
Know
Despise
Everybody
" There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money; the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know; the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings. "
Quentin Crisp
Winter
Money
Long
" It's no good running a pig farm badly for 30 years while saying, 'Really, I was meant to be a ballet dancer.' By then, pigs will be your style. "
Quentin Crisp
Meant To Be
Farm
Good
" Love is not enough. It must be the foundation, the cornerstone - but not the complete structure. It is much too pliable, too yielding. "
Quentin Crisp
Love
Foundation
Enough
" Nothing more rapidly inclines a person to go into a monastery than reading a book on etiquette. There are so many trivial ways in which it is possible to commit some social sin. "
Quentin Crisp
Person
Sin
Reading
" The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy; they want to be right. "
Quentin Crisp
Time
Happy
Happiness
" The law is simply expediency wearing a long white dress. "
Quentin Crisp
Dress
Wearing
Simply
" Sex is the last refuge of the miserable. "
Quentin Crisp
Last
Refuge
Sex