Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" Comedy is only funny when there's real pain. "

Related Quotes:

" I do like 'Game of Thrones.' I really like it. "

Game Of Thrones

" Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble. "

" I'm thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. "

Paula Poundstone

" To be or not to be. That's not really a question. "

Jean-Luc Godard

" I love mankind; it's people I can't stand. "

Charles M. Schulz

" If you are doing stand-up comedy, you have to be confident in what you are doing. That doesn't mean just because you are confident you are funny. "

Judah Friedlander

" I went to private school for a very long time, and we always wore uniforms. Then in third grade, I switched to a public school, so I was so excited to wear what I wanted on the first day. I remember I chose this orange hoodie with a skirt, and it's so funny when I think about it now because my style really hasn't changed that much. "

" Katy Perry still gets me every time. She's very funny in person! We met at the Teen Choice Awards and she pulled my cheeks apart and told me how cute I was. My life was literally flashing before my eyes! "

" I think it's a comedian's job to make everything funny. Nothing is off-limits. "

" I got attention by being funny at school, pretending to be retarded, and jumping around with a deformed hand. "

Leonardo DiCaprio

" If you want to be thought a liar, always tell the truth. "

Logan Pearsall Smith

" I'm for whatever gets you through the night. "

" From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere. "

" Communism is like one big phone company. "

" Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. "

" My mother was a nurse, and in her era, most diseases weren't understood; people put mustard plasters on knees and rubbed camphor on your chest if you had a cough and did funny things to you if you had tuberculosis - all these things that really made very little difference once proper treatments were brought in. "

" I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. "

" If you have doubts about someone, lay on a couple of jokes. If he doesn't find anything funny, your radar should be screaming. Then I would say be patient with people who are negative, because they're really having a hard time. "

" A funny thing about near-future stories: the future catches up to them. If the author is unlucky, the future catches up faster than the book can get out the door. "

Edward M. Lerner

" Never put a sock in a toaster. "

" To shoot a movie that takes place in three decades in 30 days is a lot on the hair and make-up team. "

" I can really stir up a conversation. Every time I go to a meeting or a casting, I try to make it as light and funny as I can. I'm always making really awkward jokes. You have to make life fun and not take it too seriously. I may look like I'm very serious and into my work, but if you knew me, I'm just a jokester. "

Charlotte McKinney

" My father was always a straight-up funny guy. He was silly. He was my inspiration. "

" The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around. "

Thomas A. Edison

" When I was a kid, I never did funny things to get attention. I was never a funny person. I was never, like, 'Oh, wow. I could say this some day on stage.' "

" I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. "

" I like having a beard. What's funny is when you shave a beard, you realize how freezing cold your face is! The primary purpose evolution-wise is to keep you warm, to grow hair on your face. You shave it off, and your face is freezing for a few days. "

" There are a lot of really funny guys who are very natural in what they do: Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, Seth Rogen. "

" I'm a Twitter addict. Jose Andres is a serial tweeter. It's funny to see which chefs have embraced it, and the different paths they take. "

Anthony Bourdain

" I always look at auditions as not even getting the job as much as I'm just trying to connect with this casting director so they remember me for next time. "