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" Don't judge a book by its thickness either. "

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" Why are people unemployed? Because there is no work. Why is there no work? Because people are not buying products and services. Why are people not buying products and services? Because they have no money. Why do people have no money? Because they are unemployed. "

" Organizations like the ACLU fought and won the good fight back in the 1960's, but it's clear that nowadays they've run out of useful things to do since they now spend most of their time defending the scum of the Earth from getting what they rightly deserve. "

" Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years. "

" The only thing that is obscene is censorship. "

" In order for a man to be truly evil, he must be a woman. "

" It's funny how most activists are pacifists. "

" Never question the relevance of truth, but always question the truth of relevance. "

" It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists. They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement. They are a cult. A suicide cult. "

" It's easy to idealize someone that you don't know. "

" Fighting a war on terrorism is like fighting against crime. We can never hope to eradicate crime, so we shouldn't bother fighting it. "

" If I gave a damn what other people think of me, I would be more like other people. "

" Think Tank, noun: The shower. "

" The entire universe is working against me. I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish! "

" Something is always simple until you try it. "

" The only people I've ever heard saying that disagreeing with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld is un-American or treasonous are people who disagree with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld. "

" I think; therefore, I am the center of the universe. "

" Anything on paper is obsolete! "

" When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun. "

" Yeah, computers are going to take over the programming business because they have become so fast recently that they can solve the Halting Problem in five seconds flat. "

" When you are finished with it, put it back in the first place that you looked for it. "

" Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am. "

" Live every day as if it is your last, and you'll be correct sooner than you otherwise would be. "

" Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism. "

" The people who actually do things always suffer the slings and arrows of those who don't. "

" Temporary solutions often become permanent problems. "

" Even IBM can't stand in the way of progress... for more than a decade. "

" I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan era are feeling appropriately stupid today. 'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union! - We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!' "

" Never underestimate the power of a simple tool. "

" Things always look better when you haven't seen them. "

" Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration; just think how many bombs that would buy! "