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" Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration; just think how many bombs that would buy! "

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" When anarchy is declared, the first thing we do, let's kill all the anarchists. "

The First Thing

" It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists. They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement. They are a cult. A suicide cult. "

" When you are finished with it, put it back in the first place that you looked for it. "

" Live every day as if it is your last, and you'll be correct sooner than you otherwise would be. "

" Whoever invented double clicking should be shot in the head! Twice! "

" Anything on paper is obsolete! "

" Don't judge a book by its thickness either. "

" The world is real. Consciousness is the illusion. "

" I think; therefore, I am the center of the universe. "

" Time is a resource whose supply is inversely proportional to its demand. "

" It's funny how most activists are pacifists. "

" Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years. "

" Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am. "

" 1 + 1 = 2. Everything else is derived. "

Everything Else

" The difference between being able to understand something and inventing it in the first place... is called genius. "

" If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out. "

" Things always look better when you haven't seen them. "

" Never underestimate the power of a simple tool. "

" When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun. "

" Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism. "

" When trying to locate something, search your mind first. "

" The people who actually do things always suffer the slings and arrows of those who don't. "

" You usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for. "

" The only people I've ever heard saying that disagreeing with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld is un-American or treasonous are people who disagree with Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld. "

" The entire universe is working against me. I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish! "

" If I gave a damn what other people think of me, I would be more like other people. "

" Now is the time for all good men to run like hell. "

" From each according to his ability, to each according to his ability. "

" Never question the relevance of truth, but always question the truth of relevance. "

" I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan era are feeling appropriately stupid today. 'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union! - We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!' "