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" I get tired of comedies where there are a bunch of funny guys and a beautiful woman who doesn't do anything funny. And I don't like books where there's a rough-and-tumble boy and a really clever, snotty girl. That's just not my experience with teenagers. "

Patrick Ness

Woman

Tired

Girl

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" Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious. "

" I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. "

" I think being funny is not anyone's first choice. "

" I like Ben Stein. I think he's funny, creative, and an insightful commentator on a host of issues. "

Chuck Norris

Funny

Creative

" TV is chewing gum for the eyes. "

" I don't know, maybe Australian humour isn't supposed to be funny. It's as dry as the Sahara, and I think people miss that. "

" People often can't separate, or can't understand, that to be funny is to be serious; it's a way of pulling people in and not scaring them off. I think a lot of the funny stuff, underneath it, there's a deep anxiety going on. "

" If you're OK with being clumsy, it's funny. But if you are super embarrassed, people are going to laugh at you. "

" It's funny: I was a photographer before I was a programmer. "

" Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything! "

" If you're serious, you really understand that it's important that you laugh as much as possible and admit that you're the funniest person you ever met. You have to laugh. Admit that you're funny. Otherwise, you die in solemnity. "

" There's a darkness under 'The Hangover' because ultimately there's a missing person and it's not really that funny. There's a sort of darkness under it that I love, and still people are laughing as hard if not harder than they did in 'Old School.' "

" The funny thing is people won't let me pay for things. I'll be in a restaurant and the manager will say, 'Oh no, it's on the house.' "

" O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet. "

Saint Augustine

Funny

Pure

" Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural. "

" Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint. "

" You know, fame is a funny thing, man, especially, you know, actors, musicians, rappers, rock singers, it's kind of a lifestyle and it's easy to get caught up in it - you go to bars, you go to clubs, everyone's doing a certain thing... It's tough. "

" How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven. "

" You win a race, the next race it's a question mark. Are you still the best or not? That's what is funny. But that's what is interesting. And that's what is challenging. You have to prove yourself every time. "

" Sometimes I think I'm funny. But then sometimes I see myself, and I think, 'There's somebody trying to be funny.' "

" I'm a Twitter addict. Jose Andres is a serial tweeter. It's funny to see which chefs have embraced it, and the different paths they take. "

" If you set out to write an adjective novel, you're setting out to write a mediocre novel; your allegiance is to the adjective, not to the story, and then that just sucks all the joy right out of it. "

" I direct with energy. I believe in energy. I think energy is an electric thing in actors. I try to inspire, encourage, and make choices with lots of energy. And truth. I'm big fan of truth and being funny. I like leading 50 people into battle every day. "

" For me, when I start a novel, I only have a general sense of what I am going to do - usually three or four big scenes or something to which I can really respond emotionally. "

Patrick Ness

Start

Going

" If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor. "

Joan Rivers

God

Over

" I'm a funny guy. You've got to be able to make fun of yourself. We only live once. "

" Funny things tend not to happen to me. I am not a natural comic. I need to think about things a lot before I can be even remotely amusing. "