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" It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious. "

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" I run around my house naked with heels all the time. It's so funny. "

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" My mother was against me being an actress - until I introduced her to Frank Sinatra. "

Angie Dickinson

" I meditate and I also think about meditation. Which is funny. I think about Maharishi, about just the idea of meditating. It gives me something. "

" Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. "

" You know the funny thing, I don't get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than I get along with the rich people. "

" God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. "

Garrison Keillor

" To all the girls out there who think being funny is not sexy, you are wrong! "

Chad Michael Murray

" If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. "

" Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble. "

" It's funny how people who ain't never been down there can think that America is so fair and that we should be alright. It's funny that the people who have their foot on our neck are telling us, 'Get up. What's wrong with you?' "

" An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out. "

George Jean Nathan

" I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. "

" Almost anything can be funny if said the right way - but it has to be said the right way. "

" I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. "

" I always believe that funny is serious and serious is funny. You don't really need a distinction between them. "

" During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one. "

" Until I was about 14, I was a fat boy, or at least I looked like a fat boy. I think that being funny was a bit of a defence mechanism for me, so I ended up being a bit of a joker. "

" As I get older, I just prefer to knit. "

" Without hurting anybody, we all tend to laugh at others' discomfort. When someone slips on a banana skin and falls it's funny. "

" How can you analyse what is funny? What's funny to one isn't funny to another... What's funny to you is a personal thing. "

" If something is very, very funny but possibly controversial, if it's truly funny, then it's worth doing. Things aren't worth doing for the sake of being controversial. "

" We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution. "

" Music is a great energizer. It's a language everybody knows. "

" The men I idolized built their bodies and became somebody - like Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger - and I thought, 'That can be me.' So I started working out. The funny thing is I didn't realize back then that I was having a defining moment. "

" Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. "

P. G. Wodehouse

" I'm not a fussy eater, but when I'm travelling, I try to stick to the same regime and just have my chicken and my mash and broccoli. Otherwise, you start eating all these funny delicacies, and it makes your tummy turn upside down. "

" There's nothing I would love more than to host an awards show where I'm nominated for an award - that is so funny to me. "

" I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry. "