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" I realized I was gay in the shower one day with Barbra Streisand. It happened while I was lathering, rinsing, and repeating with Pert Plus. As I was belting out the chorus to my favorite song from 'Funny Girl,' 'Oh my man, I love him so, he'll never know...' it hit me. "

Ross Mathews

Day

Song

Love

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" I've always considered myself, at the end of the day, to be kind of a storyteller. "

" I think anyone who has, you know, is in any sort of artistic pursuit, kind of goes up and down with the way they feel about their work. And I, for the most part, am pretty happy person. But, yeah. I go through definite periods of time where I'm not funny. I'm not good. I'm - I don't feel original. "

" I don't write material. Funny things happen to me in the course of a day, and I just make notes. "

Kevin Hart

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" If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. "

" Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else. "

" I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the manchild, the adolescent, characters that refuse to grow up. And yet, if you look back in the history of comedy all the way back to the Marx brothers, that's a big part of comedy. "

" The great thing for me about 'The Resurrection of Gavin Stone' is it's a throwback to the old fashioned Hollywood movie that you can watch with your family, has a message, and is funny and entertaining. They didn't call them faith-based movies; they just called them good movies. "

" The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have. "

" I would talk in iambic pentameter if it were easier. "

" To me, the funniest American of the Twentieth Century is Richard Nixon because he had the most to hide, and he was so bad at hiding it. To me, that's what's really funny - people who think they're doing a great job of hiding stuff, and it just keeps leaking out. "

Harry Shearer

Funny

Great

" Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else's expense. And I find that that's just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else's feelings. "

" If you haven't seen me lasso, you haven't lived. "

" I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. "

" I always see celebs in very weird spots. I don't always go to fancy-shmancy places, but I see celebs at coffee shops or random stores, when you're looking for a sweater and turn around like, 'OMG, that's Fred Savage!' "

" One picture is worth 1,000 denials. "

" A word to the wise is infuriating. "

" The superfluous, a very necessary thing. "

" I never looked at myself as the fat sister. Sometimes I would beat people to the punch and say, 'Oh I'm the fat, funny one,' because that's what people would say about me. But I never really thought that. "

" My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. "

" Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know. "

" Scenes change all the time. Scenes will change while you're shooting them, and you just have to roll with it 'cause that's what makes it funny. It's not being stuck in your character and how you're gonna do something, but to react to other people and to really have a real-life conversation. "

" When I turned about 12 or 13, I realised that being funny wasn't about remembering jokes. It was about creating them. "

" I'm thankful enough or blessed enough to be able to say that Miles Davis was a friend when he was alive, and he was a wonderful mentor and really, really funny, you know. "

Prince

" Life can be dramatic and funny all in the same day. "

" There's a darkness under 'The Hangover' because ultimately there's a missing person and it's not really that funny. There's a sort of darkness under it that I love, and still people are laughing as hard if not harder than they did in 'Old School.' "

" I run around my house naked with heels all the time. It's so funny. "

" Our records, if you have a dark sense of humor, were funny, but our records weren't about comedy. They were about protests, fantasy, confrontation and all that. "

" I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either. "