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" I'm one of the idiots that negotiates after I write. "
Larry David
After
Write
I Write
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" The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it. "
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Time
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" I like to be quiet, and let people find me rather than having to shout at them. "
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" I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian. "
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" Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting for them while they ski and eat chocolate. "
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" I'm not quite as anonymous as I was. "
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Quite
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" I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War. "
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Army
End
" It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with my aunt and my cousins right next door to me, with the door open, with neighbors walking in and out, with people yelling at each other all the time. "
Larry David
Walking
Think
People
" At first, I didn't realize it was gonna be a character. I just thought I was gonna be doing me. "
Larry David
Me
Thought
Character
" I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become very commercialized. "
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Comedy
Started
Become
" I never thought for a second that anything I ever did was going to make someone cringe. That never occurred to me. "
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Never
Someone
Thought
" I don't like to say anything good. I feel like I'll jinx myself. "
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Good
Anything
Feel
" I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood. "
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Hard
Tough
Miserable
" I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network was already committed to doing something with him, so I skipped a couple of hundred steps right there. "
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Steps
Right
Place
" I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that heritage on and ensure that the misery will continue for at least one more generation. "
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Now
Heritage
Generation
" Most people are completely unaware of their breath. They violate your space, they have no idea that they have halitosis. "
Larry David
Idea
Your
Breath
" There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny. "
Larry David
Funny
Jews
Might
" I'm cranky. "
Larry David
Cranky
" Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy. "
Larry David
Self-Confidence
Women
Crazy
" My defensiveness in life really helps me as a driver. "
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Really
Driver
Helps
" It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas. "
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Country
Than
More
" Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then. "
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People
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Kind
" I'm a walking, talking enigma. We're a dying breed. "
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Dying
Enigma
Walking
" I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish. "
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Night
Fish
First
" Well, as you know, I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. "
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Know
Happy
Only
" Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough. "
Larry David
Confident
Your
Bald
" I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of the audience. That's what I'm all about - people and laughter. "
Larry David
Energy
Stage
People
" There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would've been so much better if I had written it out. "
Larry David
Thinking
Day
Driving
" I don't write shows with dialogue where actors have to memorize dialogue. I write the scenes where we know everything that's going to happen. There's an outline of about seven or eight pages, and then we improvise it. "
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Know
Write
Going
" I can't stand reading anything that I've said. "
Larry David
Stand
Said
Anything
" OK, I'm happy. I'm happy. All right? I'm happy. "
Larry David
OK
Right
Happy