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" I never thought for a second that anything I ever did was going to make someone cringe. That never occurred to me. "
Larry David
Never
Someone
Thought
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" I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny. "
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" It's that I wasn't suited to do the kind of comedy that these people were coming to hear - mainstream comedy. "
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" Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days. "
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" The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it. "
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" Obviously comedic styles do change. "
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" I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, which is about a half an inch wide. "
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" I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood. "
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" All of a sudden I discovered that I'm allergic to caviar. It was the perfect metaphor for my life. When I was only able to afford bad caviar, I could certainly eat my fill of it. "
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" Religion doesn't play any part in my life in terms of how I live my life. But I don't think I've ever gone through a day in my life without hearing someone say the word 'Jew' or saying it myself. "
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" I tend to stay with the panic. I embrace the panic. "
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" When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name, I would walk around the streets and occasionally I would see an alcove or something. And I'd think, that'll be good, that'll be a good spot for me when I'm homeless. "
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