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" It's funny; recently I've started to notice people's impersonations of me, and it's basically like a hyperactive child. "

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" For a Catholic kid in parochial school, the only way to survive the beatings - by classmates, not the nuns - was to be the funny guy. "

George A. Romero

" Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter. "

" There's nothing I would love more than to host an awards show where I'm nominated for an award - that is so funny to me. "

" I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host. "

David Letterman

" It's a funny thing: my name in Arabic means hope, so I suppose I have to live by that principle. Hope is desire, feeling, and investing in a projection of something that doesn't yet exist. At its best, you witness its alchemy in your life, turning something that was once in the mind into reality. At its worst, it's delusion. "

" It's really funny because the same people who loved me as Stringer Bell were the same people that were watching 'Daddy's Little Girls' literally in tears. "

" I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it's supposed to give you a parking space. It's worked so far. "

" The nightmare is you spend the rest of your life being funny at parties and then people say, 'Why didn't you do that when you were on television?' "

" I'm screamingly funny, you know, I really am in the books. And that helps because I'm funnier than a lot of people, I think, and that's appreciated by young people. "

" After all is said and done, sit down. "

" I think the eyes flirt most. There are so many ways to use them. "

" I was at a New Year's Eve party, and someone asked me how was my year, and I said, 'I honestly think 2011 was the best year of my entire life,' and I actually meant it. "

" I think maybe people see bands and musicians as some sort of superhero unrealistic sport that happens in another dimension where it's not real people and not real emotions. So, I grew up listening to Beatles records on my floor. That's how I learned how to play guitar. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't be a musician. "

" I'm funny. I'm a comedian. I'm not a clown. "

" What's funny is that the idea of popularity - even the use of the word 'popular' - is something that had been mostly absent from my life since junior high. In fact, the hallmark of life after junior high seemed to be the shedding of popularity as a central concern. "

" People often can't separate, or can't understand, that to be funny is to be serious; it's a way of pulling people in and not scaring them off. I think a lot of the funny stuff, underneath it, there's a deep anxiety going on. "

" I like bowling. I suck at it, but I like it. You know what's so funny? I have days when I'm absolutely great at doing it, and then I have days when I just don't understand it. "

" It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to. "

" If there's one thing I'm good at, it's gathering people together to do something fun. "

" My mother was against me being an actress - until I introduced her to Frank Sinatra. "

Angie Dickinson

" Wow, I get to wake up again? Ok. You have to make good with what you've got. "

" You see much more of your children once they leave home. "

" Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. "

P. G. Wodehouse

" This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last. "

" Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. "

" There are times when I feel like I'm a traveling minister. I'm trying to go out and get kids to pick-up yard sale instruments and change the world. "

Change The World

" I like Ben Stein. I think he's funny, creative, and an insightful commentator on a host of issues. "

" It's so funny how social media was just this fun thing, and now it's this monster that consumes so many millennial lives. "

" I'm good at coming up with wacky characters and funny dialogue. "

" It's simple, if it jiggles, it's fat. "

Arnold Schwarzenegger