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" It's not so much what you learn about Mumbai, it's what you learn about yourself, really. It's a funny old hippie thing, but it's true as well. You find out a lot about yourself and your tolerance, and about your inclusiveness. "

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" Like almost everyone who uses e-mail, I receive a ton of spam every day. Much of it offers to help me get out of debt or get rich quick. It would be funny if it weren't so exciting. "

Bill Gates

Funny

Day

Rich

" Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them. "

" I know my strong points: I work hard, I have talent, I'm funny, and I'm a good person. "

" Things have to be funny first, and if they want to have a point, that's awesome. "

" I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. "

" Being funny is everything to me. "

" A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. "

" Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends. "

" You cannot dictate what people find funny, what people find attractive, or what people find scary. There is not a norm. "

" I do come across people who don't like me, don't like my comedy, don't think it's funny, it's too cutesy, or whatever they hate. And it's like, 'Okay. That's your opinion. Somebody liked it, so that's good.' Hopefully it balances out. "

Demetri Martin

People

Think

" There's always going to be someone as funny as you or funnier. "

" I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. "

" People forget how outcast 'They Might Be Giants' can be. They have a reputation for writing really deft, funny, clever melodies, and they also make a lot of music for kids, which is terrific, but when you see them in concert, they can rock the house. "

" When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life. "

" A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live. "

" Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. "

" It's funny the way most people love the dead. Once you are dead, you are made for life. "

" Back in the '70s, like one of my favorite movies ever was 'The Bad News Bears', and that was a kids' movie, but I don't think of it that way. I think of it as just a great movie because Walter Matthau was so funny and so harsh with those kids. "

" I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing. "

" There's one thing about baldness, it's neat. "

" What was funny if you were there is that we were all immensely sophisticated people who knew exactly what she was going to say and we're chatting away, nice to see you. "

" Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint. "

" It's funny because I've made a living off of words, but words get in the way of what you really want to say. "

" The great thing for me about 'The Resurrection of Gavin Stone' is it's a throwback to the old fashioned Hollywood movie that you can watch with your family, has a message, and is funny and entertaining. They didn't call them faith-based movies; they just called them good movies. "

" I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. "

" I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either. "

" I would ask my mother to show me how to walk - and she did show me. That's why I think it's funny when people say, 'Did so-and-so teach you how to walk?' And I always say, 'You must be talking about my mother, because it was my mother who taught me how to walk.' "

Naomi Campbell

People

Think

" The funny thing is, I'm so used to not caring what anyone says, good or bad, that unfortunately even when people say good things... I wish it made me feel good, but it doesn't. "

" Diane Keaton is good for women in and of herself. She's smart and funny and real. "

" Unless someone wants to look funny, I'll not recommend anyone to copy my bowling action. But on a serious note, with the confidence that I have got from the amount of runs I have been scoring, when I'm thrown the ball to bowl, I am pretty sure of what I have to do. I may not be the most attractive to watch while bowling, but I can be effective. "