Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" It's that I wasn't suited to do the kind of comedy that these people were coming to hear - mainstream comedy. "

Related Quotes:

" I have no secrets. "

" My background is degradation and sloth, mostly. "

" Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy. "

Self-Confidence

" OK, I'm happy. I'm happy. All right? I'm happy. "

" I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network was already committed to doing something with him, so I skipped a couple of hundred steps right there. "

" Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm Jewish. "

" Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised. "

" The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it. "

" Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then. "

" I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, which is about a half an inch wide. "

" When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom. "

" I'm one of the idiots that negotiates after I write. "

" I'm cranky. "

" Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on! "

" People don't yell nasty things at actors - they let them continue. "

" If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny. "

" I tolerate lactose like I tolerate people. "

" I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become very commercialized. "

" There's a sense of spontaneity, and no emphasis on jokes in this show. People generally talk the way they talk in life if you were in this particular situation. "

" You write about what you know. "

" I don't take on big things. What I do, pretty much, is make the big things small and the small things big. "

" I believe in something. "

" When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name, I would walk around the streets and occasionally I would see an alcove or something. And I'd think, that'll be good, that'll be a good spot for me when I'm homeless. "

" I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it's hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood. "

" There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would've been so much better if I had written it out. "

" The addition of nuts in salad... I always find to be beneficial. "

" Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days. "

" Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious. "

" Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline. "

" I can't stand reading anything that I've said. "