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" I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive. "
Jerry Seinfeld
I Think
Think
Delicate
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" Sometimes I'm really funny, sometimes I'm quiet, sometimes I'm shy, but I'm constantly changing. "
Elle King
Shy
Sometimes
Quiet
" A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. "
Steve Martin
Know
Sunshine
You
" I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. "
Rose Kennedy
Old
Funny
Me
" Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else? "
James Thurber
You
Like
Funny
" You can always tell when a man's well informed. His views are pretty much like your own. "
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Always
You
Man
" I read part of it all the way through. "
Samuel Goldwyn
Read
Funny
Part
" Do you know, it's funny, but I never thought of being blind as a disadvantage, and I never thought of being black as a disadvantage. "
Stevie Wonder
You
Black
Thought
" We actually found some home videos, some really funny footage of me when I was around 3 years old. I come up to the camera to do a Nixon impression. I don't know who taught me that, but I come up to the camera and said, 'I am not a crook.' I got a really good laugh. You see me register that bringing joy to people is a positive thing. "
Annaleigh Ashford
Positive
Good
I Am
" Electricity is really just organized lightning. "
George Carlin
Organized
Electricity
Funny
" In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first. "
George Carlin
First
Person
Left
" The worst way of flying, I think, is standby. It never works. That's why they call it standby. You end up standing there going, 'Bye!' "
Jerry Seinfeld
Worst
Flying
Way
" I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. "
Winston Churchill
Funny
You
Ugly
" My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.' Funny thought. "
Brendon Urie
Friend
Thought
Dog
" I get a stack of scripts, like, once a month, and most of the time, you find these placeholder girls that are there to provide a bounce for the male character. So we know he's funny because she's serious and she's mad at him. We know he's strong because she needs saving. So really, her job is to validate this personality trait of our hero or male. "
Amber Heard
Time
Character
Funny
" I thought 'Borat' was a breakthrough comedy, because it was really funny. It wasn't some studio-produced script with 14 writers. "
Steve Martin
Funny
Thought
Breakthrough
" Stand-up is hard. Or to keep it at a certain level is hard: I have no writers but me. "
Jerry Seinfeld
Writers
Level
Keep
" Most of my show is true; like, 90% of everything I say on stage is true. I just have to find the way to make it funny - that's the difficult thing. "
Trevor Noah
True
Find
Difficult
" You know what? At the end of the day, funny is funny. I hope to see the end of all the female cliches that are written in a lot of comedies that are named chick flicks. "
Wendi McLendon-Covey
Day
Hope
End
" Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble. "
Taylor Hawkins
Life
Laugh
Funny
" I started writing 'Southern Baptist Sissies' right after I had written the screenplay for 'Sordid Lives', so that's when I started on a darker path in telling the truth about my journey in the church, but there was still a lot of funny. "
Del Shores
Path
Funny
Truth
" It's funny: I can never sleep between shows; I think it's because I don't like to switch the motor off. I'll probably have some chicken or pasta, though never the two together, and maybe go out for a quick wander around. "
Richard McCabe
Think
Together
Chicken
" Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. "
Robert Benchley
Drawing
Funny
Nothing
" When I tell people I'm a comedian they say, 'Oh, are you funny?' I say, 'No, it's not that kind of comedy.' "
Susan Sarandon
Kind
You
Say
" It's funny: your happiness is contingent on a bigger picture besides just yourself. "
Debra Granik
" I'm screamingly funny, you know, I really am in the books. And that helps because I'm funnier than a lot of people, I think, and that's appreciated by young people. "
Kurt Vonnegut
Know
You
Think
" All generalizations are false, including this one. "
Mark Twain
Funny
Including
Generalizations
" I love practical jokes and humor. That there's frankly no joke that I don't think is funny. I love practical jokes, but I don't like being scared. "
Mitt Romney
Funny
Jokes
Love
" I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny. "
Dane Cook
Get
I Can
Funny
" It's funny how you never think about the women you've had. It's always the ones who get away that you can't forget. "
Chuck Palahniuk
Women
Think
Always
" Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. "
Mel Brooks
Tragedy
You
Die