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" My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.' Funny thought. "
Brendon Urie
Friend
Thought
Dog
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" It's funny; it's a real balancing act. In TV, everybody's talking about authenticity. In order to make 'Dirty Jobs' authentic, I really can't be overly informed. The minute I am, I become a host... It's a very tricky business paying a tribute to work, because TV is very bad at it. "
Mike Rowe
Bad
Business
Funny
" It is not funny that anything else should fall down; only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh? Because it is a gravely religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified. "
Gilbert K. Chesterton
Matter
Down
Fall
" Being funny wasn't a career choice growing up, it was my way out of situations; a way to survive another day. "
Tracy Morgan
Growing Up
Day
Funny
" I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. "
Gloria Steinem
Man
Advice
Career
" I think you figure out how to be funny by necessity. It's not a natural thing, being funny in the face of tragedy is kind of demented. "
Julie Brown
Tragedy
You
Face
" It's so funny because I listen to songs that I recorded that I didn't really know anything about at the time. Later on I'm starting to feel the songs. Sing them first, feel them later. "
Tanya Tucker
Listen
Feel
First
" I'm attracted to women who are smart and funny and ambitious and have lives of their own and great families. Isn't that what attracts anyone? "
Tom Brady
Own
Smart
Great
" I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host. "
David Letterman
Talk
Sing
Dance
" Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder? "
Don Rickles
Wonder
Clothes
Funny
" If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. "
Tallulah Bankhead
Mistakes
Funny
Life
" I'm very, very amateur, which is funny because I'm not in the amateur leagues. "
Shawn Mendes
Funny
Very
Which
" Leave America and you'll find that the consumers in many other countries enjoy watching advertising. Not because the products are better, but because the ads are produced to be entertaining. Sometimes they are funny. Sometimes they are dramatic. Sometimes they are just beautiful. "
Simon Sinek
Beautiful
Funny
America
" I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. "
Winston Churchill
Funny
You
Ugly
" I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights. "
Jay London
Tonight
Watching
Funny
" May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. "
George Carlin
House
Funny
Evil
" I like children - fried. "
W. C. Fields
Like
Children
Fried
" Being a funny person does an awful lot of things to you. You feel that you mustn't get serious with people. They don't expect it from you, and they don't want to see it. You're not entitled to be serious, you're a clown. "
Fanny Brice
Serious
Clown
Feel
" Being nice can be funny. A lot of my jokes are like, 'Let me take a bad situation and try to put the best spin on it.' "
Ron Funches
Funny
Me
Nice
" Humor is the oxygen of children's literature. There's a lot of competition for children's time, but even kids who hate to read want to read a funny book. "
Sid Fleischman
Book
Time
Funny
" Personally, I feel like I'm trying to redefine what a really good rapper can be like. Like, I think it's not often where a good rapper can be making funny music. "
Lil Dicky
Feel
Funny
Good
" If you believe, as I do believe, in reincarnation, they say that every time you come back, it's because you have to finish something. I've a funny feeling that my thing in this life is to have one relationship after another. "
Marie Helvin
Believe
Relationship
Time
" My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. "
Jimmy Durante
Funny
Her
Now
" I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. "
Steve Martin
Head
Hate
Funny
" If you're OK with being clumsy, it's funny. But if you are super embarrassed, people are going to laugh at you. "
Leo Howard
Funny
Laugh
People
" Scenes change all the time. Scenes will change while you're shooting them, and you just have to roll with it 'cause that's what makes it funny. It's not being stuck in your character and how you're gonna do something, but to react to other people and to really have a real-life conversation. "
Yara Shahidi
Funny
Change
Character
" What I am looking for is a blessing not in disguise. "
Jerome K. Jerome
Funny
Disguise
Blessing
" My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles were all funny, and I felt that energy, that delivery, that timing, that sarcasm. All that stuff seeped into my brain. "
Jeff Ross
Brain
Timing
Funny
" I don't have a caustic sense of humor. What I find funny, that humor comes from a much gentler place. "
Vera Farmiga
Sense Of Humor
Funny
Humor
" Censorship no longer works by hiding information from you; censorship works by flooding you with immense amounts of misinformation, of irrelevant information, of funny cat videos, until you're just unable to focus. "
Yuval Noah Harari
Focus
Cat
You
" I own and operate a ferocious ego. "
Bill Moyers
Funny
Ferocious
Ego