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" I always dreamed of living in N.Y.C. "

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" In America, I've been told so many times that I look 'too Jewish' that I stopped counting. "

" I didn't want to be known as a gay comic, but as a comic who happens to be gay. "

" Remember the phrase - 'Act your age, not your shoe size?' That didn't apply to me, as they were the same until the age of 12 when my feet stopped growing. "

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" I would love to get married, first of all, from my children's perspective. People don't think of children when they think of gay marriage, but I do have children, and for them to see their family validated as other families are validated and protected by our government, yes. "

" Some people use stand-up to get something else in their careers, but it's truly the art form of stand-up I love. "

" I love being a Givenik Ambassador. Not only does it give me a platform to discuss my favorite charities, but I get to talk about my other favorite topic - 'The Judy Show!' "

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" Comedy is all about having a point of view, and it's also about power. "

" Growing up in New Jersey, bat mitzvas were all about the elegant parties. "

" The fight in theatre is focus, focus, focus. "

" Of course I love cooking Eastern European food because I'm a Jew, but I also love making roast chicken. I love making Hungarian goulash. There are a lot of egg noodles in my cooking. "

" Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative. "

" When I was a kid, I'd read about celebrities who didn't want to talk to their fans after a show. I told myself, 'That's terrible, and I would never do that.' "

" Female comics cannot dress provocatively on stage. "

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" The more life experience you have, the more comedy you can write. "

" To have a job making people laugh really is the greatest thing. "

" Unfortunately, I cook for two boys, and they don't care what it looks like on the plate, and neither do I. "

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" I started taking all these cooking classes. I learned a lot in them, but you think you're going to retain it, and you don't. Under the pressure, it's hard to retain everything. "

" I do believe that it's something that we don't talk about, but when there are clearly defined gender roles, it is much simpler. Because you don't have to think, which people apparently don't like to do. "

" As scary as it was being raised by one Jewish mother, I have to feel for my kids because they have two Jewish mothers. "

" When Joan Rivers walked through the curtain on 'The Tonight Show,' nobody in my house was allowed to utter a sound. Her gait was full of pep and purpose and her voice unmatched. "